Food For Thought

[Atone]

(Verse)
These days rappers don't make sense, they come a dime a dozen
phoney as a 3 dollar bill, and they ammount to nothin
but i give you a penny for my thoughts and stand above em
and you can bet your bottom dollar there will never be another-
like me to add my 2 cents in the game, i gotta change the course
and if you don't believe in me you're bettin on the wrong horse
i saddle up for battle, i come runnin outta the gates
ready to stir up emotions, unstable, ready to break
Can't tame me, i'm derranged, off the range
wild like a mustang - i got my foot on the gas
fire up the tail-pipe, these other rappers blowin smoke up your ass
no leg to stand on, and you gotta get it in your head-
stomach the truth that i speak with these rhymes i spread
like butter on bread, and this is just food for thought
but why should i settle on the farm when i can take over new land?
what i mean is, why stay in one spot if i can expand
grow to be better and instead of letting the haters kill me
and hear em say what i won't, i show the world what i will be
let me get into your nervous system an d make sure you feel me


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[Just Silver]

I really liked this one almost every line had some wordplay or a punchline

Flow was nice as well The last few lines were not as good but usually natural

Really good shit keep it up guy

The money and horse theme rhymes were impressive how you placed the words

[Spyder]

I liked it, I liked the idea of all the money bars. Flow was easy to find.
Only thing I'd say is work on the multies, really just found end rhymes in this piece.
Other than that, keep it up

[Atone]

i'm aiming to make a few changes in my average style of rap, i've been on the same bitter relationship/positive thought style for so long, i'm gonna try some new shit

[Sam.]

Hot drop there. You excelled in the field of content and flow, no fuckin doubt. As long as you keep the reader/listener interested, Multis can be ignored. Not saying that Multis are bad for you, it's just that you don't use much. Intelligent verse.

[Snakebeast]

I like how each little bit of wordplay segways and fuses together. Much better than the other verse you posted, imo. More rhymes here too. But while I love my multis i.e. I jack off to Tech N9ne everyday, stuff like this is perfectly fine. Multis aren't everything, and if you're sacrificing them for something like this, then I say keep this stuff :3

[Atone]

Not bad Atone

Are you going to build on this?

I'm going to attempt to yes, apart of my reason for bein g on the verge of not making any more music was that i felt like all my stuff was the same subject matter and i wasn't saying anything different from my other songs, and then a few days ago i was listening to Talib Kweli and began writing this verse, so i'm going to see what else i can do

[Sam.]

Good. One should be versatile. Don't be stuck in the same place saying that you can't move.