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Song i wrote

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Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Aug 21st, '07, 02:05

During the warm n squeaky nights in the sentry, i took the time to write this. Criticise.....let's see if you truly interested in giving constructive feedback.

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Also this one

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My name is Rickie and i got a Dickie. My name is Buck and im here to fuck.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Ka0t1c » Aug 25th, '07, 18:19

i woudnt of typed that shit up either, and also i would've kept my name off those as well.
oh yeah... and thanks for nothing too
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Aug 26th, '07, 14:12

Come again?
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My name is Rickie and i got a Dickie. My name is Buck and im here to fuck.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby sinemm » Aug 26th, '07, 17:37

why im having an idea that like ur tryin to be the lil 50 cent? :unsure:
LIFE WOULD BE A MISTAKE WITHOUT MUSIC!!
Friedrich Nietzsche
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Aug 26th, '07, 18:16

sinemm wrote:why im having an idea that like ur tryin to be the lil 50 cent? :unsure:


Wasnt u around when they called me Lil Curtis?
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby sinemm » Aug 29th, '07, 14:35

no :unsure:

but you shouldnt be proud of being called lil curtis
LIFE WOULD BE A MISTAKE WITHOUT MUSIC!!
Friedrich Nietzsche
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Aug 29th, '07, 14:39

sinemm wrote:no :unsure:

but you shouldnt be proud of being called lil curtis


lol who cares?
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My name is Rickie and i got a Dickie. My name is Buck and im here to fuck.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby shady4life! » Sep 2nd, '07, 18:28

wat the fuck man do u wanna kill us? Ur handwritin :o and there is sooo much. Stop bein lazy and just type it out. Im curious to see wat this song is about. ;)
If u dont like the way i act then blow me, i ride with the real peeps who know me.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Sep 2nd, '07, 18:59

Wuts wrong with my handwriting?
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby shady4life! » Sep 2nd, '07, 19:36

Kojack wrote:Wuts wrong with my handwriting?


nuthin man actually but its just a lil small and there is sooo much :shock: i think it wudda been better if u typed it out instead so we can read it easier and faster since its sooo long, i dont think anyone actually took the time to read every single word but since i am a nice guy i think i will. Hold up.............................................................*5 minutes later* ..........................
aight i just finished the first. To be honest i really didnt think much of it, rhymes did not always work and were a lil bit too simple, i am not sure if it will pass as a real song, i sensed no flow, and did not really get wat the message was meant to be. To me it just seemed like u was narratin a story and at the last minute tryinta rhyme.

I did not read all of the second one but it seemed quite similar to the first. Lemme givya a tip, for long narratin songs like that with no chorus wat grabs the readers attention most are the rhymes, and your rhymes are too simple and dont always work to well, and i hav not see a single multi since i hav started readin, from the way things seem u need a lotta practise. Anyway u got 5 years befo ur album drops so if i were u i wud make great use of em and start practisin like hell.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Sep 2nd, '07, 19:38

Erm...i recorded it 4 months ago already? So it stands as a song. I dont feel like doing multies n metaphors n shit, i dont want that in my lyrics.
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My name is Rickie and i got a Dickie. My name is Buck and im here to fuck.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby shady4life! » Sep 2nd, '07, 20:02

Kojack wrote:Erm...i recorded it 4 months ago already? So it stands as a song. I dont feel like doing multies n metaphors n shit, i dont want that in my lyrics.


:whistle: well okay ur call i was just tryinta help man but honestly the song seems quite borin, and simple without them.
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Nu Syd » Sep 3rd, '07, 08:42

interesting if i do say so myself
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Re: Song i wrote

Postby Kojack » Sep 3rd, '07, 18:04

Oh well...im writing a new LP now so i dont mind about them.

Its in the Grind LP if anyone wanna take a listen.
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