MA FIRST DROP

[Arabian Shady]

yea yea, check check 1,2, 1,2
this is for all of ya'll on ur vista n xp 2
here goes nuthin:

Fucked your mama while her bones still crippling
Take some responsibility bitch,
Your about to have another sibling
I aint kidding, I’m watchin your blood pressure go up
While your panic buttons blinking, heart sinkin?
You mite not kno me at all, but kno that
I’m the real rap kingpin, still thinking??
O shit, the blinkin just stopped, your pants
Stained and dripping, Eyes averted
You aint even looking, You coudnt handle it
No wonder the air started stinking!


yea, i've been wanting to post some thing here for ages
i'd appreciate ur response, gd or bad
i just wana improve, lol
ne ways hit me
peace

[sinemm]

defo not my style actually told ya
and its short..short sentences if you work on them would be cooler.. and of course to me the theme and the emotion is important than rhymes and stuff liek that so..anyway
keep up

[Arabian Shady]

yea thnx
i kno ur style
but thnx fo checkin it out ne ways
peace

[Rain Matrix]

not bad for a first drop

keep practicing

[shady4life!]

not bad for a first drop

keep practicing

yeah kiddo

[James R.]

Not bad for a first drop, what you're gonna wanna do is make it so your line rhyme with another line an try not to skip around with your rhyming because that makes the rhyme scheme hard to follow. Do that and you'll jump leaps and bounds with your style.

[Arabian Shady]

thnx man!
i hav been waitin for a review frm battlers like u guys
the thing wid me is that i only kno how 2 rite diss tracks
thats how ma fukin brain works, its like a curse at times but i cant help it
i'll post something new soon just to show that ive improved but i appreciate ur review
thnx

n if ne of u guys could post ur views on it i'd be gratefull
thnx peace

[C-Game]

was decent for a first drop
there were some rhymes but it wasnt correctly positioned..

keep practicing..

[Enimee]

last line didnt fit but the rest was ridiculous structure off i lil but who am i 2 talk

[Arabian Shady]

c game:thnx for chekin it out, i'll drop soon
enimee:its niceto c that u cheked it out, thnx, i understand tha advice, workin on it
will gget bak soon
thnx

ne ore feeds please??
peace