Thinking about a song...

[mcZu]

I was thinking about a song, I'm planing to record something these days, and I came up with some lyrics, just a few..
I kinda freestyled it accepela, line by line, after that I did polish it a bit, made it a bit more complex..
Here it is...

breathless is what 'they/day' became, 'cause haters are just 'weak/week'
Like each 7 has 24 hours to live when I speak..A hh
I make a verse 'bright', just by dropping some lines 'B'
you see I became 'right' after that like I left the left ya C
Like the end of my bars state the three first characters of the alfbet
The Z to the U is Being clear like a star at the sky after that
He is still bright like the sun, meaning the fire is acurate
Wich means my lyrics do intend to be complex when I'm at it

What do y'all think? ... because if it's alright I'm planning to complete it...

[Darkblade44431]

that made no sense, and u quickly got off the subject of haters

[neversnooze]

try listening to a beat without the accapella like instrument and then try writing your own lyrics

[mcZu]

that made no sense, and u quickly got off the subject of haters

Yeah I know..it was just a couple of lines, but thnx for the feed

try listening to a beat without the accapella like instrument and then try writing your own lyrics

thnx for the advice, I usualy just write without a beat....

[mcZu]

You try to write a complex piece with little knowledge of the subject of complexity. The word play was nothing more than words rhyming, whether replaced by the secondary words or not.

Don't run before you can walk. Try starting things out a bit simpler.

thnx for the feed
yeah.. I will try something less complex, but something that does make sense...