Urban Punk wrote:Emadyville wrote:Damn do I got to bump this shit for you, I tried helping you out, ha maybe you ain't been online.
Nope, I get your point and I appreciate that though by taken “away from exactly what I were saying” you totally contradicted yourself, when you said in your first post my “rhymes were weak/forced” by influencing the flow you’ve forced word’s and changed the emotion of the entire verse. I don't know how you write song's and ill give you your due I went on your myspace and had a look at your tracks and there not bad if anything there well wrote and therefor I asume you know what your talking aboutanyway's thanks for the comment's
PS
My bandpage - http://www.bebo.com/Devilville
Well it's because I never take other people's rhymes/verses and change them, not something I'm used to, so that's pretty obvious. I was just trying to show you better ways to set up lines, use internal rhymes, double rhymes, and always have end rhymes. That was my point, the content of the material was the last thing on my mind. And thanks for the comments about my music, I'm glad to see you understood the lyrical ability in them and the rhyming. Maybe try and write something else and see if you got better with all of those things.