Fiasco Experiment Day 1 Freeverse

[ShAdYTiLIDie]

Awesome piece dude, I liked it a lot!! I read it while listening to a beat and didnt catch the flow at the beginning but I'm sure it was there. Awesome rhyming and I can tell you definitely have a good vocabulary Some of the lines were way over my head! hahah thats a good thing though. I'll have to look them up!!
Any way, nice piece dude. this should be a cool experiment.

[Slim Fiasco]

I was just going to log out when I saw this. I'll edit in my feedback when I come back later. CHeck this same post again.

Fuck, I just wrote the feedback and closed the tab by mistake. So anyway, here I go again. This is a great piece and you definitely didn't disappoint! In the beginning lines, I liked the reference to them old empires, and then came my favorite line which is when you mention the Boston Celtics logo. I hate that team, but their logo is dope, haha. I also liked the choice of words such as scriptures and loco which simply sound cool, with the former representing something sophisticated and the latter an interesting sample of jargon. I also liked the use of the LOL and OMG acronyms which reminded me of Lupe's verse on Don't Stop, but it's also another example of interesting choice of words. Finally, it was cool that you referenced your own pieces and the rhyming was great in general.

[Mr.DGAF]

name's dropping the heat. For real, this is one of the best drops I've seen since you came back. The rhyming was pretty damn nice, the references were spot on and all. This was really good man, the only thing I'd nitpick is the fried fish juice line haha, I get that it's supposed to be like that, but still, it just sounds a bit...weird.

[SG.]

Well, damn, this was good. Much better than that verse you sent me before. I loved all the references and the general vocabulary you used in this piece.

Google's gonna get some work tonight though.

[J.R.]

I'm so on fire, I'm taking all the oxygen
So find you a safe house and protection from Washington
My empire like Ottomans, your shitty Byzantine
My lyrics so witty and as addicting as nicotine
A hippy like the logo of the Boston Celtics
With scriptures makes you not go with your music and sell bricks
My lyrics make you hopeless,you go loco and restless
I keep writing though, does that mean that I'm selfish?
No shit given though, you're corny and whack
I'm sitting here LOLing at your stories and raps
When I rap, "OMG it's that dude who did Mic Abuse
Hide and do some training or else you'll be screwed like fried fish juice"
But it's not about your whackness, it's all about my greatness
The final exam to determinate who ain't shit
The greatest, I'm at you like you're GPS wired
Cause as long as I exist, no one'a gonna flee the 'cane fifi

Definitely the best verse you've dropped since you came back. The lines I bolded were stretched, although I think you know that lol. keep it up. flow's solid.

[Spyder]

what is this fiasco shit everyones doing

[CrashBand]

This was nice name. A fan of similis and references huh?

"......it's all about my greatness
The final exam to determinate who ain't shit"
I liked that line

The whole thing flowed really smoothy. Some of your similes were quite simple tbh "addicting like nicotine"

Again, this was a nice piece.


edit:

what is this fiasco shit everyones doing

viewtopic.php?f=29&t=146088

[SG.]

Well, damn, this was good. Much better than that verse you sent me before. I loved all the references and the general vocabulary you used in this piece.

Google's gonna get some work tonight though.

Hahaha, thanks for the feedback bro. When this experiment is over, what do you say about doing our unfinished collaboration? I think we need to do it tbh.

We must indeed. You choose the topic/beat, and I'll start writing once this experiment is over.