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I Don't Understand

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I Don't Understand

Postby gutawafang » May 20th, '14, 03:12

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Woke up crying today cuz my fucking spine hurts
Thinking of various ways to define words
To understand myself and how my mind works
I mean, it's just a spine, not some dying love
That made me cry worse, till I had to admit
I'm never made for this planet, I'm like bragging I'm shit
I've always believed in that, as if shit is my religion
My character's fucked, I don't fit to my description
I'm a girl at heart, but actually I don't know
the fucking world is hard, and is sad like the cold snow
And at the same time, it feels like motherfucking hell
Contradicting so much, not even time could fucking tell
I don't understand why these fucking seeds grow
Into flowers and they wither when they feel low
Such a happy thing that dies with my inner soul
It's what I see in the reflection that the mirror shows
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby shadyblogger » May 20th, '14, 03:17

Whew, dope shit brah. I enjoyed it. It had one of the best beginnings I've seen in a CW piece on here. That first line had me hooked. Your rhyming was good and flow was decent for the most part. I also liked the way it was kinda on the shorter side but was really nice. Keep it up :y:
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Maddie » May 21st, '14, 18:59

A lot of people believe they have a backbone and will stand up when someone else tells them to sit down though most of the time people won't. Nice work.
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby gutawafang » Jun 6th, '14, 00:50

Thank you all for checking it out. Bumping because I thought there must be more feeds.
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Sam. » Jun 6th, '14, 18:23

Sweet and simple - That's all I've to say.
[Rollefsen] - SajN retired, bitch got old, unlike Sams "ladies".
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Supershade » Jun 7th, '14, 15:37

Some nice rhyming
Cause I can’t explain to y’all how dang exhausted my legs felt, just having to balance my dang self but on eggshells I was made to walk but thank you, ma, ‘cause that gave me the strength to cause Shady-mania
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby gutawafang » Jun 9th, '14, 03:00

Sam. wrote:Sweet and simple - That's all I've to say.

Thank you man. :y:

Supershade wrote:Some nice rhyming

Thank you for reading it. :y:
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Arabian Shady » Jun 17th, '14, 10:52

Guta!
This was dope! Im glad you kept writing homie.
Love how you kept the structure and maintained flow throughout.
Keep at it ma man :y:
ArAbIaN ShAdY


We're all on the same page, Yet we're standing apart on different lines'
So when we face rage, Ya'll fake it and let THEM commit horrific crimes
50 years & going straight, Yet this performance aint worth your time,OUR
Shit is BACKSTAGE,Cause the front page aint worth Kashmir and Palestine.
"Front Page",Arabian Shady


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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby gutawafang » Jun 18th, '14, 07:08

Arabian Shady wrote:Guta!
This was dope! Im glad you kept writing homie.
Love how you kept the structure and maintained flow throughout.
Keep at it ma man :y:

Oi!!!! It's the jumping elephant again!!!! It's been awhile man I know. Nice seeing you still here lurking. Thanks a lot for reading it man!
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Halftongue Dre » Jun 21st, '14, 01:29

Dope. You keep it real. Better then what I'm producing right now. Keep writing yo!...
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby gutawafang » Jun 23rd, '14, 07:06

Halftongue Dre wrote:Dope. You keep it real. Better then what I'm producing right now. Keep writing yo!...

THank you very much for reading it man. :)
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Just Silver » Jul 5th, '14, 13:14

Pretty nice flow but the spine thing sorta threw it off
Multis are getting there I can tell you have a much different style than I do

Just keep up imagery and rhyming and you'll be good
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby gutawafang » Jul 10th, '14, 06:55

Just Silver wrote:Pretty nice flow but the spine thing sorta threw it off
Multis are getting there I can tell you have a much different style than I do

Just keep up imagery and rhyming and you'll be good

:worship: :worship: :worship: THE SILVER FEEDBACK! :worship: :worship: :worship:

Thanks man. :flower:
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby EvryOnesACrtc » Jul 10th, '14, 08:37

Good stuff, man. I like the opener. Dope rhymes. You had some pretty impressive entire line rhyming going on which caught me by surprise. Deep content. Only complaint I have is that I wish it would've been longer.
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Re: I Don't Understand

Postby Solace » Jul 16th, '14, 18:36

This isn't really feed, but my favourite part had to be the flow around here.

gutawafang wrote:I mean, it's just a spine, not some dying love
That made me cry worse, till I had to admit
I'm never made for this planet, I'm like bragging I'm shit


The way you skipped over rhyming in place of "dying love" and pushing it to the next clause worked really well. Then again, if you were Eminem people would say you meant to bend "dying love" with "crying today cuz" :o

gutawafang wrote:I'm a girl at heart


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