practice ( FEEDBACK!!!!!)

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im the waterfall ,but a flow like a river,
kidney shot but knocked out yer liver,
then a hit yeh with the left ,follow up with the right,
knocked yeh so high , you flying like a kite,
when a rap my mic snarls back at me,
its shouting come on try attack me,
the mic is my enemy , the stage is the ring ,
when a go there im pronounced the flow king,
hit back, with the sik track, how i attack,
move aside of ma ride, shifted has the tide,
rip you apart, hit with the sting of a dart,
music aint a noise, its a street made art,
dont come from the mouth , comes from the heart,


just keeping myself fresh lol some practice, leave feed please

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bump

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

Not bad I like what you were tryna' do there man. Keep it up.

lol i like the effect of personification for some reason

for dumb people

"when a rap my mic snarls back at me"

thats personification ( i think )

giving a in-animated object human like features

idk why i think its kool using it lol

anywae thx man

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

Lmao.

I should know, but I have no idea what personification is lol.

lol i like to search of little effects like that basically just search the net like your revising for a english class and itll give you kool little features to add to your rythms lol

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

That's good keep it up, you'll even improve more





Btw, you people won't believe me but I know what personification is I acutally did learn something in school for once lol....we learnt that when we was writing poems

sarah is smart

it cant be true * slaps himself* NOOOOOO!!! we are all doomed

lol thx

[Inches]

mannn
soundin good
keep it up

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

mannn
soundin good
keep it up

thx man

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

That's good keep it up, you'll even improve more





Btw, you people won't believe me but I know what personification is I acutally did learn something in school for once lol....we learnt that when we was writing poems

sarah is smart

it cant be true * slaps himself* NOOOOOO!!! we are all doomed

lol thx

Yes I can be smart at times

sarah are you blonde ?

[Inches]

mannn
soundin good
keep it up

thx man

np
pretty sic shit

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bump

i need feed on this for a reason

[ThomasAguanis]

nice man
using the personification and metaphors was pretty cool.
it's awsome how you're trying everything and improving at it too.
keep it up man

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

nice man
using the personification and metaphors was pretty cool.
it's awsome how you're trying everything and improving at it too.
keep it up man

thx man imma keep practicing at all these things i got alot more imma try use aswell , im sorta lucky that im good at english eh ? lol