goin again

[Ka0t1c]

im going again, before i was folding within
now i know that the end is closing on in
so im showing i am
transforming from exploring this land
as i open up what i've been absorbin
to come and perform more than a man for words of a friend
in return towards my fans and observed by my fam
or i would burn cuz the torture that tends to corner me in

but im a warrior i warn you, im takin no orders thru headquarters
quote this poem i send n record it to spin
but my vocals won't bend to contort to pretend
i support the portal which stems where demons roam n i'll skin
their spirit and torso's own sins, an unfortunate event
but i was born in this world with immortal intents

[James R.]

I wasn't really feelin that man. The structure made it damn near impossible to find the flow you were using. And a lot of the lines were like random thoughts. They didn't come together like they normally would. It would have been better had you made the lines a little longer and led into one with the line before to make a complete thought it would have been better. Keep writin.

[Tash8]

didn't like it, like james said your structure was impossible to read. Yea I know i say structure isn't as important as everything else, but you made me change my mind about that.. I couldn't feed on anything else cause I couldn't read it well.