Gona record this shit tomorrow prolly.. feedback appreciated

[soperman005]

All of your life your told things that you can't do
Well shit now I gotta case of the damn blues
Stressed and depressed, heart beatin' crazy in my chest
Maybe its a test, or maybe this is too complex
This is my hell, its my cheap fate
Do so many drugs I cant think straight
Got my parents and my teachers breathing down my nck
Working up a sweat, but I dont see no respect
So I flee, mothafucka, leave me be
Just take another hit, now I reak of weed
And I don't even write unless the beat speaks to me
Only person that I even try to please is me
So pissed after I get dissed by a friend
Oh well, we all die but a whisper in the wind

[soperman005]

thanks for the feeback chet.

ill see if i can add something before to make that flow better

[Purple23Haze]

I didn't like your first lines, thats all, cause the rest is ill the way I read it especially the part were we are but whispers in the wind!

[Tash8]

sounds too corny imo