The Election

[Emadyville]

I wrote this in a half hour, planning on recording this next weekend if I can find a beat. Either way it's a political song, and I'd like feedback. If you don't agree with my political views that's fine, it's my opinion, I ask that you feed the lyrics, flow, and overall message. Thank you.

Another election and another critical mess,
I’m nervous again, there’s so much visual stress,
Gallop polls on the news plus every digital guess,
It’s viral, let’s not spiral and have one individual left,
So much is troubling in the house of republicans,
Their skin is bubbling if Obama runs the government,
But if he does we’re safe after the general election,
Unless Florida does it again without federal detection,
We need it for our future we cannot remain hopeless,
I wrote this to keep it real and to continue my focus,
Posted it for all and worked on my flow-just,
To remind you of how George Bush was bogus,
But this isn’t a democrat liberal or conservative,
This is the truth please understand my words-and-give,
Me a chance to elaborate this whole catastrophe,
Yes I’m voting Obama there’s no reason for asking me…

Well I need to start when the man was sworn in,
When the votes in Florida already gave us a Gore win,
That’s the first thing, and next is the worst tragedy,
September 11, you know my stance on this automatically,
And do it he allowed, signed and passed the patriot act,
Now we’re all martyrs and we’ll never get a patriot back,
Freedom of speech is gone, not to mention habius corpus,
This song could land me in jail before they play me a chorus,
I could be at the mall, driving or eating at hooters busy,
And end up in lockdown and not be released like Scooter Libby,
It’s like he’s the king of the hill screaming out Geronimo,
And laughing as those who spoke out are in Guantonamo,
Cause he forced us to believe Iraq was a smart move,
Until we go and some many lives we start to lose,
When we should be after Osama cause of the drama,
I guess this could be one reason we need to vote Obama,
But it’s not that, what about the George Bush economy,
Everyone’s being raped without charges of sodomy,
Big oil companies laugh as they screw us in the ass,
Making trillions off of what they’re doing with the gas,
So we go into a recession, not once but two times,
And now an American dollar can get only get two dimes,
For any other currency, it’s an economic emergency,
I guess we never turned to see us get burned in the third degree,
As pharmaceutical markets target the sick and needy,
With government support cause even the governments greedy,
And they profit like who the hell cares if they’re on welfare,
They never made a change or tried to fix healthcare,
Now another crisis this one with home mortgages,
Banks supported by Washington, all of them, hers and his,
And what about our future, what about the national debt,
Bush built it up trillions after taking irrational steps,
When the next president enters will there be a capital left?
Please just go out and vote that’s the message of this factual mess…

[Robbie G]

Good stuff man, you had alot of good liens and got the point across.

But it’s not that, what about the George Bush economy,
Everyone’s being raped without charges of sodomy,
Big oil companies laugh as they screw us in the ass,
Making trillions off of what they’re doing with the gas,
So we go into a recession, not once but two times,
And now an American dollar can get only get two dimes,

[yoshi]

man, i like your stuff i'm not following American politics very closely, but i kinda agree with what you said. doesn't matter though, the point is it was really dope.

Cause he forced us to believe Iraq was a smart move,
Until we go and some many lives we start to lose,
When we should be after Osama cause of the drama,
I guess this could be one reason we need to vote Obama,

^ liked that part.

[mcZu]

Nice piece dude, great lyrics.. It flowed kinda good, atleast how I flowed it.. You probably have some kind of idea of how it should flow
Liked the message, and I agree with your opinion... But that's not the point now.. You wanted feed back.

Structure was ok, Some rhymes look forced..I dunno, it depends on how you flow these lines..
Like this one:

Now another crisis this one with home mortgages,
Banks supported by Washington, all of them, hers and his,

I don't know how it's supposed to rhyme, but I guess it depends again on how you pronounce it and what kind of flow your gonna use..

Message was great, especially what you did in the last part of the second verse.
Overall a nice piece of work man

Can't wait to hear the actual song

[Emadyville]

Thanks for the input and feedback everyone, like I said wrote it in a half hour between classes so.

[Emadyville]

And if anyone has a beat they think might fit this song please let me know. I know need to get on this asap if I want to record it.

[Ka0t1c]

this piece was pretty great, this is definitely a keeper, i'm glad you wrote a lot as well, that makes it even easier for a song to be released quite easier than if u hadn't finished ur thought process


keep it up bro, this is by far one the best from u and i'd like to see u make it...

[Emadyville]

this piece was pretty great, this is definitely a keeper, i'm glad you wrote a lot as well, that makes it even easier for a song to be released quite easier than if u hadn't finished ur thought process


keep it up bro, this is by far one the best from u and i'd like to see u make it...

Thanks man, i plan on it, just need the beat to work

[DelinQuent]

hot, fucking amazing the way you pulled it all together without sounding like you were jumping around.

this is gonna need an epic sounding beat with a GREAT delivery, so focus on the delivery when you record this or i will come to catty and kill you.

[Emadyville]

hot, fucking amazing the way you pulled it all together without sounding like you were jumping around.

this is gonna need an epic sounding beat with a GREAT delivery, so focus on the delivery when you record this or i will come to catty and kill you.

Thanks dq, i honestly might need a random ass beat to get this recorded, idk tho, thanks for the feed everyone.

[<Stiiccy>]

Well I need to start when the man was sworn in,
When the votes in Florida already gave us a Gore win,

epicness
good lord dude...

good job on not jumping around with your flow like most people in these types of songs

incredible job...not 1 complaint...just come in with a fire ass delivery

[Emadyville]

Ok this song has been recorded. It is being mastered and shit and will debut on Desales radio tomo. I will post it on here that night and also on my myspace but I will post it in a new topic for the audio stage. Hopefully everyone who feeded this on here can feed it again cause a few lyrics changed and shit, plus it's obviously on the recording not the just the writing.