Why don't parents beat their children no more?

[AspirinE]

When u say "timeout" U asume it gone work for the kid.

I was in a boarding school back in in 98 and i sure as hell remember that I gave no fuck about those timeouts, it actually is a good time for the kid to read some comics...

And u have once again started the topic of abuse..
Wat if ur kid is just jumpy and uncontrolled in nature ( fucking hormones getting to him) ... how are u gonna teach him then?

The belt thing: have u even felt wat its like to tell if its actually abuse.
Its not painfull as physical pain, its painfull coz the kid feels sorry for himself.

Nah, u restarted the abuse topic when u mentioned the belt I really don't care whether it hurts or not when u hit someone with a belt - no, i've never experienced it myself, but i've seen a few kids who got beaten by their parents with belts and bats and whatever, and i promise u that they experienced physical pain and they had the marks to show it.

using a belt cannot be justified anymore than using any other kind of weapon - why would it be necessary to whip somebody with anything, at least have the decency to use your hands when you abuse your kids, and yes i do think that hitting a child is abuse no matter how badly they behave -when you start hitting your kid the only thing it proves is that you've lost control... it's not okay to hit other ppl, it's classified as violence and u risk going to jail if u hit another person unless it's self-defence, so why should it be okay to hit your kid? That's not self-defense, that's just impotence. Lock them in their room, take some of their privileges away like their PlayStation or their Ipod or whatever...

btw if the kid's a "psycho" like Sarah says hitting him will definitely teach him nothing but that it's okay to be violent to other ppl so that would just escalate things

OMG how could u put a belt in the same sentance as a bat....
and for goodness sake wat kind of a man is the kid gonna grow up to be if he is so terified of a red mark on his ass wich will pass away.
A girl certainly never deserves to be hit hard, not even a little painfull, but in most cases girls get their hormonal crase at the time wen their mind is more developed.

Ur speaking a way any woman would speak...

yes its an extreme mesure not something u do on the regular, sometimes talking doesnt work.

And u dont teach him to be violent, u teach him to be an honest respecting person, infact u build up his character.

I cant believe im living in a world that will will sooon be dominated by softies who wont be able to take a risk in their live and show character wen needed.
I should take over the world someday.

[Curious]

OMG how could u put a belt in the same sentance as a bat....
and for goodness sake wat kind of a man is the kid gonna grow up to be if he is so terified of a red mark on his ass wich will pass away.
A girl certainly never deserves to be hit hard, not even a little painfull, but in most cases girls get their hormonal crase at the time wen their mind is more developed.

Ur speaking a way any woman would speak...

yes its an extreme mesure not something u do on the regular, sometimes talking doesnt work.

And u dont teach him to be violent, u teach him to be an honest respecting person, infact u build up his character.

I cant believe im living in a world that will will sooon be dominated by softies who wont be able to take a risk in their live and show character wen needed.
I should take over the world someday.

Putting a belt and a bat in the same sentence is very easy, they're both unnecessary means of using force. And about the kids I know they're gonna grow up just fine now that their parents can't hit them anymore...
And I'm not only speaking as any woman would speak as u say but also as a woman with just a hint of insight into child rearing and psychology, and there are lots of ways of building a kid's character without having to resort to violence - you build character through love, support and guidance, and hitting someone doesn't categorise as any of those
being violent to somebody that's smaller than you does indeed show character - a pretty weak and impotent one...
and being opposed to grown-ups hitting children has nothing to do with being a softie but everything to do with being humane and recognising that violence doesn't solve problems, it creates them
u don't know me in person, so actually u can't tell whether i have a problem showing character, and telling u that i don't is just an empty comment that can't be proven and therefore is pointless - on top of that it all depends how u define character, and somehow i don't think u and i have the same view on that

But if u taking over the world would mean a genocide on homosexuals and legalising beating your kids then I'll run for presidency as well n do everything in my power to "beat" u

[Ivy]

Well, I think the best method of punishing a child is a hand, I could never use a belt....and I know that child abuse got out of control for the uniformed officers in the Military, so now the United States Government has stated that any official in the United States 5 Branches of the Military: Army, Navy, Marine, Air Force, and Coast Gaurd; are unable to hit their child more than 3 times...if the child is left with a welt or a bruise due to the excessive force the parent will be charged for unlawful neglect to a minor or a child. Therefore, a lot of parents have cut down, but I've seen that the children are still intact and growing to be some very successful people. Some however, are not so lucky and grow to resent the law and what not. But that's all I had to add to this.

[AspirinE]

U wont "beat" me, coz its not moraly legal.

And u know, ive never in my life met a person that has been slaped for wrongs in his childhood that wouldnt thank their parents, it takes time for them to realise but, they do.

Once again u have neglected the option of the kid not being able to embrase tell-off type of teachings. They might apear to have learnt a lesson yet they have had it easy.

they needa learn that for every mistake u make in life, life is gonna woop ur ass 10 times harder.

maybe u have grown up in a wealthy country were people are just generally happy, and theyre parents dont have to woop ass for the kid to get above 80% grades to get scholarship instead of dying their head blonde and hanging out in bars.

Thank god the hippy atitude is gone, it seems like it might actually be back.

Teach ur kids to be respectfull, by showing them who is boss. U let them slide, someone who lets their kid slide is a pathetic excuse for a parent.

[Ivy]

I'll admit, I'm a spoiled wrotten child. I've had it easy. But, I've also had a really ruff lifestyle. My dad tries to make the best out of the life we were given. He was all I had, so when I done wrong, he'd sit me down and make me listen, and if I acted up...I'd be sitting there for hours until we could discuss the matter. I think I've turned out quite well even though I was never "trully" physically punished. I mean, I don't party, I don't lie, I don't break the law (or so he thinks), and I'm a great student. But, I guess that's 1 in a billion. Kind of like dropping a needle in a hay stack...

[AspirinE]

Now honestly for me it was like.

My grandma use to give me a slap on the back of my head everyones in a while while i was studying.

and if shit got real bad ( like once i faked reportcard grades ) and my dad, without even shouting just said : "lets go, ill give u 10 good hits, and if u shout ill add more, take it like a man"

that there moment made me feel like i deserved it and i got a fair punishment.

Also its a better way then wen people hold frustrations on people. Wen its done its done, and ur like a new person. Of course some of u might not have experienced that, so how could u possibly tell if it hurts ur feelings?

[Ivy]

Of course some of u might not have experienced that, so how could u possibly tell if it hurts ur feelings?

I guess I'll never trully know

[Curious]

U wont "beat" me, coz its not moraly legal.

And u know, ive never in my life met a person that has been slaped for wrongs in his childhood that wouldnt thank their parents, it takes time for them to realise but, they do.

Once again u have neglected the option of the kid not being able to embrase tell-off type of teachings. They might apear to have learnt a lesson yet they have had it easy.

they needa learn that for every mistake u make in life, life is gonna woop ur ass 10 times harder.

maybe u have grown up in a wealthy country were people are just generally happy, and theyre parents dont have to woop ass for the kid to get above 80% grades to get scholarship instead of dying their head blonde and hanging out in bars.

Thank god the hippy atitude is gone, it seems like it might actually be back.

Teach ur kids to be respectfull, by showing them who is boss. U let them slide, someone who lets their kid slide is a pathetic excuse for a parent.

well, beating is legal in some cases, depends how you define beating - anyway u know i was just kidding, right

personally i've met a lot of ppl who've been slapped or beaten by their parents who definitely don't thank them later - it isn't necessary to beat your kids to gain their respect, my parents have never slapped me and i have the highest respect for them exactly because it has never been necessary for them to stoop that low, but that doesn't mean i didn't know when i did something wrong 'cause not hitting your kids is not the same as not getting angry with them...
and not hitting your kids doesn't mean that you let your kids slide, it just means that you believe in different principles on learning them how to behave

beating your kids is not just something that occurs in "poor" countries, plenty of children get slapped by their parents in my country as well, but that just makes it even more absurd - what gives you the right to beat your children when it's a generally acknowledged that violence towards other ppl is wrong?
i'm not out of a wealthy family, on the contrary we went through some really rough times, and yet my parents never had to resort to hitting us - again it has to do with having different views on how you teach your kids basic principles in life
the respect u gain by hitting your children is a "respect" based on fear of the consequences, where u need to teach your kids an understanding of basic moral principles if they're to learn how to behave in society

i agree that the kid on the video is out of control, but he didn't just become like that from one second to the next, it has been through a process where his parents haven't set any limits for him, and that's not the kids' fault but the parents' - all parents have an obligation to rear their children so that other ppl can stand being around them, but they also have an obligation to treat their children as they would treat all other human beings which includes not being violent towards them. and if they can't handle that by themselves they need to get professional help

the other option is that the kid has some sort of illness or deficiency which makes him act totally out of control, but then he needs to get medical treatment which is a totally different matter

Anyone else notice that Asp and Curious usually have diferent views on things in the debate section?

yeah, i noticed but it wouldn't really be fun to debate with someone you just agree with all the time n as long as we can manage to stay friends
it's cool

[ines]

there are now more controls on it and more institudes where you can phone too and tell your story.and you can go to the childs care and they believe always your story.and in the past it was normal that kids get some claps in their faces and on there ass

[hot_dogg]

props to aspirin, that shit's true, and its become less and less common these days.. especially in north america haha
many kids i know swear at their parents and they dont really give a fuck