gay jokes

[DrunkenDeath]

There were these two friends, one who was gay, who died in a horrible car accident. They both went to heaven and were standing at the pearly gates when St. Peter met them.

St. Peter asked the first man for a picture of his wife. After looking at the picture, St. Peter asked him if he had ever cheated on her.

The man replied, "I was unfaithful to my wife one time."

St. Peter decided to give the man a station-wagon for him to drive around heaven.

Now it was the second man's turn.

St. Peter asked him for a picture of his wife and then asked if he had ever cheated on her.

The man replied, "Actually I'm gay, but here's a picture of my lover, and I never cheated on him."

St. Peter was very impressed and decided to give the man a Ferrari to drive around heaven.

After a few months in heaven, the two friends met up with each other. The second man was bragging about his Ferrari when the other turned to him and said, "I wouldn't be bragging if I were you. I just saw your lover on a skateboard."








Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes.

The first man said, "My Ryan loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky."

The second man said, "My Ross was a good fisherman, so I'm going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake."

The third man said, "My Jack was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time."


How do you know if you're at a gay picnic?
The hotdogs taste like shit!

Four fags are sitting in a hot tub. They notice some sperm rising to the surface. One fag says, "Ok, who farted?"

How do you fit three gays on one barstool?
Turn it upside-down!

What did one gay sperm say to the other?
How are we ever gonna find an egg in all this shit?

Why'd the fag get fired from the sperm bank?
They caught him drinking on the job



How do you know you're in a gay amusement park?
They pass out gerbils in the tunnel of love.

How do you prevent homos from getting AIDS?
Tell 'em to sit down and keep their mouth shut.


How many faggots does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, as long as there's plenty of oil and he's real careful.

What does a gay turkey say after he sucks your cock?
Gobble, gobble, gobble de goop.

What painting do members of NAMBLA love?
Little boy blew.

Did you hear Vaseline is coming out with new labels for its petroleum jelly?
They're going to have a picture of missing gerbils on it.

What does one fag say to another fag going on vacation?
Can I help you pack your shit?

How do you know when you're in a gay church?
Only half the congregation kneels to pray!

What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar?
May I push your stool in?

What does AIDS stand for?
Anally Injected Death Sentence

[DrunkenDeath]

i guess this should go in comedy crib, huh?