Funniest lines

[CrashBand]

"Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too."

For me, one of his funniest of all time.

[Fleka]

My rap style's warped, I'm runnin out the morgue
witcha dead grandmother's corpse to throw it on your porch

[Sam.]

Objectively analyzing art is a difficult thing for me to completely grasp... like... If an artist's intention is to make you laugh with two lines, and he achieves that goal, rhyming is a non-factor. The artist achieved his goal with the work.

Now, you guys are saying if an artist writes a piece with MORE rhyming and achieves the same goal of making you laugh (for the same reasons), then his work is better. It may be objectively better in terms of difficulty to write, but that doesn't make it any funnier. And trust me, I realize one of the reasons why Em is so great is because of his ability to craft intricate rhymes without compromising subject matter/flow. However, there are a lot of things to consider before dismissing a piece as a lesser work of art simply because it rhymes two syllables instead of three.

For example, there's a certain cadence with two syllable rhyming that you can't get with three syllables. If an artist wants that shit, I don't believe his work is automatically inferior to pieces with more complex rhyming.

Your points are valid. I was just talking about Eminem's rhymes only.

*ON TOPIC*

Speakin of lift off....
I'm blastin off...your ass is soft...so I'm startin to jack off
Cuz I'm so horny...and your lyrics are so corny
That they bore me and I woke up too late this morning
Or too early...wait a minute there goes Shirley...
The girly I fucked last year when her hair was curly
Couldnt remember it cuz I was Infinite
And I met ken Kaniff in Connecticut
He said his predicits and pronouns and wanted to throw down
And he said oAUI like youoAY...and then he walked up and said oAU let me snake bite
youoAY
And I said hell no...kicked him with my shell toe...
Gave him a elbow...Ayo Proof ...go....

[sbolli1]

"I don't need a tank-top to be a wife-beater" - W.T.P.

In his Recovery era of punchlines/wordplay, this is certainly one of the least embarrassing. It's just perfect for Em on account of his love for all things hoe-bashing. Plus, "wife beater" goes with the awesome rhyme scheme that precedes it.

[UofLCard]

"I don't need a tank-top to be a wife-beater" - W.T.P.

I'm a bit shocked it took him this long in his career to correlate wife beaters to the article of clothing.

[SliK]

"I don't need a tank-top to be a wife-beater" - W.T.P.

I'm a bit shocked it took him this long in his career to correlate wife beaters to the article of clothing.

He actually wrote that line long before recovery. It appears slightly reworded in his book The Way I Am.

[ShadysDisciple]

I didn't read all 8 pages so forgive me if this was said but:

(gun shots) What was that? Petshop boys.

The way he says it just gets me every time

[Fleka]

I didn't read all 8 pages so forgive me if this was said but:

(gun shots) What was that? Petshop boys.

The way he says it just gets me every time

I think that "pff pff pff" is running over Pet Shop Boys with the turbo boost car, not gunshots.

[Innovation]

Fuck it I give up, I'm surrounded in blue suits
Came out with a white flag hollerin' truce-truce
And surrendered my weapon to cops, wasn't me
It was the gangster rap and the peppermint Schnapps

[ShadysDisciple]

I didn't read all 8 pages so forgive me if this was said but:

(gun shots) What was that? Petshop boys.

The way he says it just gets me every time

I think that "pff pff pff" is running over Pet Shop Boys with the turbo boost car, not gunshots.

Lol wow i'm slow I always thought it was gun shots

[maTTyFresssh]

"SHOVE A GERBIL IN YOUR ASS THROUGH A TUBE!"

Fack.

[SliK]

I didn't read all 8 pages so forgive me if this was said but:

(gun shots) What was that? Petshop boys.

The way he says it just gets me every time

I think that "pff pff pff" is running over Pet Shop Boys with the turbo boost car, not gunshots.

Lol wow i'm slow I always thought it was gun shots

Lol did you think he was shooting nerf balls?

[Sam.]

"I'm afraid if I close my eyes I might see her
Shit.."

The phrasing makes it funny.

[Kill You]

"Shit's about to get hairy as motherfucking Chewbacca's nuts"

I actually laughed my ass off at this.

[UofLCard]

"Arrested, molested myself and got convicted"--Lown Down Dirty

"Titty fuckin' you 'till your breast nipple flesh tickles my testicles"--Bagpipes From Baghdad