{NEW} Redzek - I'm Gone ( Ft Fati )

[Le Tunisien]

feedbacks appreciated in advance! thank you!
http://usershare.net/a6rgz4m2hbzm
http://www.zshare.net/audio/781282006ceda690/

lyrics:

[Fati]
we got one life ,so, just let me live
no, i wil not fight,i'll just forgive

you know it aint right,now to leave me alone
there is nothin in sight ,thats why im gone

[Verse 1 : Redzek]

im sittin home alone
and i pick up my phone
to talk to myself,
to walk wont help
so i look in the mirror
and then i go nearer
tryna see clearer
the fukin real me
and ask him whats the deal B?
i just wanna feel free
these demons that i have
inside of my fuckin head
i see em when i go to bed
im sick of nightmares
i wanna end it right there
and leave this world
cuz i believe it hurts
so i'll deceive anybody
who ever said im superb
its gettin on my nerves
cant stand anymore
cant understand what i live for
and i pretend that the lord would give more
chances to everybody in the earth
and this got me gettin cursed
cuz i know where i been but i dunno where im goin
im blowin my mind Throwin-
myself,knowin it is fine
i'll leave it all behind

[Chorus2 :Fati]

we got one life ,so, just let me live
nooo, i wil not fight,i'll just forgive

you know it aint right,now to leave me alooone
there is nothin in sight ,thats why im gone


[Verse 2: Redzek]

and i wonder when im gone,is somebody gonna miss me
i did nothing wrong,its a comedy to diss me
i been waitin so long, to find where i belong
but i never did,so i'm tryna stay strong
and yeah i make her bed cuz its life what i lay on
its heavy what they weigh on..me
its just hard to see ,it aint right if i cant
when everybody can, i'll get up and be a man
i look happy from the outside
even though i really am broken inside
cuz i was hopin i died
its like im chokin the pride
and i got nothin to hide
i wanna make it clear
im keepin it sincere
breathin is what i fear
"yeah im leavin you dear"
i hear talkin my soul
its here,walkin my whole
body,this shit got me
really goin nutz,
everytime i say its just
what it is,its like i lay n play on the dust

[Chorus: Fati]

we got one life ,so, just let me live
nooo, i wil not fight,i'll just forgive

you know it aint right,now to leave me alooone
there is nothin in sight ,thats why im gone

[Bridge:Redzek]

like im speakin too the dirt,
i fight,im bleedin cuz it hurts
knowin that im never heard
when im Mad i go beserk
when im sad i know the words

to say to be happy
it is happenin to me
but its a habbit to see
all the stupid haters now are just battlin me
but i am settin em free

[Chorus:Fati]

we got one life ,so, just let me live
no, i wil not fight,i'll just forgive

you know it aint right,now to leave me alone
there is nothin in sight ,thats why im gone

[Outro : Fati]

like im speakin to the dirt,
i fight,im bleedin cuz it hurts
knowin that im never heard
when im Mad i go beserk

[gutawafang]

Alright man. Here goes.

I love the first two verses man. Flow was fucking good. Lyrics were quite good. some lines are pretty common.

I don't like the title of the song and maybe the overall concept. I don't know man, I just don't like the word "GONE". The chorus could be better if Fati did just one voice instead of two. One of her vocal track in the chorus is out of tune, completely. Maybe no need backup voices in the chorus. But she got potential, she got the voice tone which i like. I mean the tone not the melody.

And the bridge where you "sing" is fucked up. LOL. You shouldn't sing man. When you sing, your pronounciation is not so good plus you sing completely flat man. Seriously flat. LOL. So yeah, the rap part in the bridge is very good man. I like it.

But to connect better, I suggest you sing with Fati in the LAST CHORUS. I know I'm contradicting now by telling you to sing, but it would sound better if both of you sing int he last chorus.

Overall, I give it 7. It sounds good, especially when you rap. xD

[Le Tunisien]

Alright man. Here goes.

I love the first two verses man. Flow was fucking good. Lyrics were quite good. some lines are pretty common.

I don't like the title of the song and maybe the overall concept. I don't know man, I just don't like the word "GONE". The chorus could be better if Fati did just one voice instead of two. One of her vocal track in the chorus is out of tune, completely. Maybe no need backup voices in the chorus. But she got potential, she got the voice tone which i like. I mean the tone not the melody.

And the bridge where you "sing" is fucked up. LOL. You shouldn't sing man. When you sing, your pronounciation is not so good plus you sing completely flat man. Seriously flat. LOL. So yeah, the rap part in the bridge is very good man. I like it.

But to connect better, I suggest you sing with Fati in the LAST CHORUS. I know I'm contradicting now by telling you to sing, but it would sound better if both of you sing int he last chorus.

Overall, I give it 7. It sounds good, especially when you rap. xD

thanks for the feedback man! and yeah haha i was fukin around in the singin part lmao...and hmm it might be a good idea to sing in the last hook,i'll try to put just one of her vocals to see if its better and thanks again guta!! apreciateddddd

[ahckiryL]

beat was cool...verse 1- lyrics were aight, emotion was ok, quality was ehhh, voice sounds with adlibs added and all sounds a lil alienish, flow was on point tho...hook was straight up annoying tho, like even the second and third time it didnt grow on me...verse2-basically same as first feed...and that bridge of u singing or what ever idk what that was or were u tryin to sing...no hate, my advice is just keep improving maybe u havent found ur voice yet or u still experimenting with different tones but the one u used was hard to get use to right away...so yea keep doin ur thang tho 1

[codyp]

Alright after listening to this track and reading the other comments. I don't have much to add, but I do have a little. Flat out, it's a mess all over the place. It's basically a sloppy framework for what sounds like it could be a good song.

IMO, yes you are still trying to find your style, but I do love the feel of what you were going for. Also both your styles combine well together, so I encourage you guys to work together more.

As for recording, I am not sure what kind of equipment you guys are using. But it's not hard to get decent equipment for a small price now a days. Also knowing how to use the equipment will greatly improve your sound, and that just comes from experience.

Keep recording songs, don't need to share/release them until you feel like you reached a new level. Then post them for feed back and see what you are still missing. Also keep singing, KEEP doing it. I don't care if people on this forum think you suck, you can't get better unless you practice, and you can't telly ou are getting better or even know how to improve unless you record.

[Le Tunisien]

Alright after listening to this track and reading the other comments. I don't have much to add, but I do have a little. Flat out, it's a mess all over the place. It's basically a sloppy framework for what sounds like it could be a good song.

IMO, yes you are still trying to find your style, but I do love the feel of what you were going for. Also both your styles combine well together, so I encourage you guys to work together more.

As for recording, I am not sure what kind of equipment you guys are using. But it's not hard to get decent equipment for a small price now a days. Also knowing how to use the equipment will greatly improve your sound, and that just comes from experience.

Keep recording songs, don't need to share/release them until you feel like you reached a new level. Then post them for feed back and see what you are still missing. Also keep singing, KEEP doing it. I don't care if people on this forum think you suck, you can't get better unless you practice, and you can't telly ou are getting better or even know how to improve unless you record.

its true what u'r sayin man,thanks for the advice..greatly appreciated