Eedee - "Chasing Not A Shadow" [Week 3]

[Eedee]

LoF

YouTube Link

WEEK 3 OF 8

I step into the stage, all the lights are on me,
Best to lose the rage, it's my kind of army.
All the ups and downs, come here and teach me how
I wanna sit up like a King but don't wanna steal the crown.
My doubting causes trouble and it stirs within me,
They found him in the rubble of this reality pretending
That the feelings that he has when he sees her that they're his
He's paired with the world he fights off with bare fists.
I see the biggest eyes and a monster dips inside
I die, can I try to lay it on ya, it's alive.
This kid denies it all, it's growling now
I wished that I would see it's prowl and how
can I relinquish control to a frozen glance
I pretend this didn't happen, Lord knows I can't.
It's all new to me, but who's to see it now?
Cuz when I jump back into this, it's only me that keeps me down.

It's not a shadow that I'm chasing
It's so real that I'm not sure that I can face it...
It's not a shadow that I'm chasing
It's so real that I feel as if I'm dying cuz I'm anxious. (x2)

I'm feeling so weak and bent from the day's stress
I take breaths just to play next up the apex.
I'm positively dogmatic when it's done, come said it
I'm "Phillin'" up with this shit I guess I'm just PA-thetic.
But she fills me up with revelry, feelings that you'd never see
I tend to cut 'em off like dealing with the severed jeans.
Asking if I'd ever be good enough to be her man
Making my head go in circles like a fucking ceiling fan.
Feeling so paper thin that the wind can knock me over
Gotten colder but the weight I just want it off my shoulders.
It's a dark night, my heart's like "You know you want her"
The car lights as I run make it seem it sold the offer.
Because I can see the light, I reach out to grasp it,
Spit goes down the hatch and finally I'm breathing right.
I walk into the brightness, I'm kissed with a joyous feel
I was scared it wouldn't be okay but now I know it will.

Go see for yourself, I'm jumpin' in with both feet,
My smile has found something that it won't greet.
I'm only a lonely man, with a holy stance,
Told the hand to point me the way to show me back.
But I grabbed it and twisted it, molded it to fit the life
Bits and pieces, it's a feeling holding up this shit tonight.
I'm about to break like a kit-kat, it's bad,
Popping tic-tacs cuz the pressure is a bitch, man.
I need a kickstand if I'm gonna ride this one,
Like quicksand I'm sinking when I'm with one.
It's done, I'd like to think of it as finalized,
Tried to fight this one off but I realized that I'm alive.
I have thoughts as if you might even be the one
Too quick to think this ball of light, this girl makes me see the sun.
She's lights up my world and produces a shadow
I'm not moving for that so, I'm not using an act, though.

[mdemaz]

This is fucking nuts.

It's only been like a year, almost, and you've gotten really good.

It must be a pain in the ass to record in your dorm, though.
I could tell that you're suppressing your voice.

[Eedee]

Glad you guys liked this. This is probably my favorite track I've done in terms of aesthetic-sounds. I think I mixed it very well. Thanks for the listens.

[classthe_king]

Be warned that when I feed songs I only comment on things I didn't like so you know how to improve, if I don't comment on something that means I liked it.


Your delivery was better on this song but you need to be more clear when you rap. There was multiple times each verse that you slurred your words together or something and it was hard to understand what you were saying. That held the song back a lot.You need to make sure every syllable is clear and different than the syllables next to it. A way to improve that would be if you fixed your flow. There was a lot of times you had to many syllables so you had to rush what you were rapping to get it to fit and that led to the slurred words. You also need to either work on your breath control or your punch ins because most of them were easily noticeable and that can hold back the song in some people's eyes. The punch ins weren't bad and didn't hinder the song but they were still pretty obvious.

[Eedee]

^ Thanks man. I'll definitely work on what you said this winter when I can get back in the studio. I appreciate your feedback, I'll add it to my list of shit I need to work on lol

[Vettori]

I like this, How long have you been recording ? Sounds to me like in a few years you'll be making the music you really want to I like the ranges in your voice. That was the last thing I grasped while practicing this artform.

Not much criticism, Im more excited to see how much you'll grow over time.

[Eedee]

I like this, How long have you been recording ? Sounds to me like in a few years you'll be making the music you really want to I like the ranges in your voice. That was the last thing I grasped while practicing this artform.

Not much criticism, Im more excited to see how much you'll grow over time.

Been at this since June 2011, so just a little over a year, really. Had a 4 month break earlier this year while I finished up school and shit.

Thanks for the feed, man. Appreciate it.