Does anyone like Atmosphere?

[seh]

This is a song I recorded during a month long period where I exclusively listened to Atmosphere.. It is emo/ corny I know, but tell me what you think.

http://www.zshare.net/audio/2043421563e42d28/

Verse 1
If I can't find the right words I will just tell you
and if it comes out wrong, at least I felt you
I've seen a view from a balcony in hell too
all you could say is I hope god helps you
like my whole existence is at your mercy
like in your presence, I am not worthy
we were about more then legal fees, attorney's
leaving now is like pulling out a turned key
but its ok if you leave
I'm not trying to pull out your loose teeth
but dont come back around next week
like 'sorry babe I just need time to think'
well I just need time to drink and sink
while you talk about my problems with your shrink
but my flaws are really just your insecurities
so that love we once had is longer pure to me
you burned me bad bitch you burned me in the third degree
but at least these drum loops act like a cure for me
and I wish you never heard of me
but the thought alone is just absurd to me
I need you

chorus 2x
yeah i need you babe
no fuck you
i dont want to see your face
cuz i love you
it kind of hurts just to say it
but my words are all i have so just take it
i need you

Verse 2
Standing in the corner of a room facing a wall
closing my eyes tryna take in it all
as i spread my wings i continue to fall
i remember your ringtone when you'd call
it was 'hot stuff' by donna summers
so now i listen to that stupid song and just wonder
what it could've been like and as good as my pen writes
I wouldn't have fuel if you weren't in my life
my strife my pain my troubles
fuck it, i'd even learn how to cuddle
if you'd give me a second of your attention
but why would i want to mess up perfection?
why would i want to step in your direction?
when you made it clear that you value our 'friendship'
well i dont value it at all
if i cant have the whole thing i dont want you at all
i need you

Chrous 2x

[Darkblade44431]

It's not bad.
Quality could be better. And i don't think you should let only one person influence you that much, then you start to sound like them. So don't do that, come up with you're unique style. I also feel like you were sorta copying "FUCK YOU LUCY" by him. Good flow and lyrics though. keep workin at it.
btw, i love Atmosphere! he's one of my fav. rappers
so props for that too

[<VerbalTouch>]

really loving your verse but could use more emotion in some parts really great song.

[Jay-19]

Atmosphere is one of the best out there!

But this doesn't sound anything like them. By that i don't mean it's bad at all.

You got some nice lyrics. I don't mind if it's "emo", I like those kind of tracks.
And your delivery is good, could be better, but that's nothing I get caught on, because everyone could improve their delivery.
The beat is cool, I like the sampling on it.

Overall a good track man! Good job!