It's Not Over (Version 1)

[Tash8]

I need honest feedback since i wrote this for my girl, it's about the past 8 month (knowing now we can't see each other for 3 months)

http://www.zshare.net/audio/651880339d1d6e95/

keep thinking of the times we couldn't keep our hands off each other
the way we used to kick it, the way we'd smile at each other
looking back now it seems so far in the distant
but everytime i think of you, i think of the instance
i had to see you leave, now i'm just left with pictures
and memories worth all my happiness
now i bet i sound like a depressed freak who lacks any sense
but before i get carried too far away
I wanna tell you how i prepared for our first date
i opened my closet, threw all my clothes down
i changed my outfit about 5 times, no joke now
ha, anyways, i wanna let u know, even though
your so far way, your still with me, each and every day
yeah, each and every day, each and every day

cause it's not over, no it's not over
your my baby girl aka lil tomato
it's not over, no it's not over
your love warms me up as the nights get colder (uh)

rewind to this date jan first 2009
i'm heading to this party with two friends of mine
little did i know, what's gonnna be in store for me
one drunk girl acting all --- for me
you finally wake up and there was something that you say
"tamer and a junior" with a smile on your face
we finally end up moving to the living room
the clock keeps ticking and it hits around two
a few of us up and i'm laying next to you
crazy thing happens, i get stabbed by i wont say who
blood splurging everywhere, guess it's all true
nothing good ever happens after it turns two
but a few weeks later, i'm completely mistaken
jan 26, we're around the pool table playin
7 month later, and i'm still here saying
the same thing, i love you

[,-,'-{Bar}-',-,]

like i said before, this is a real personel track so i listen to it different, in the first verse you flow ok sorta slow and stretched at parts but you stay on beat, second verse the flow is alot better, rhymes dont matter on this concept, but the writing aspect of painting a picture here you do really nicely, maybe more descriptive at some parts would have gave a better feel to this but i didnt lose any enjoyment from it. your pronouncation was good and delivery was good for most party just some were depressed delivery like this can sound lazy but its hard to try make it sad and energetic to keep it active if you get me so i aint buzzed bout it.

overall i think its a real nice track for your girl man she'll love it im sure, and like i said i can imagine her listening to this on those nights were she misses you.

[°[~CHR!$~]°]

bar actually summed it up very well
as i told you too..your flow seems weird in the verse...with all that stretching...seems like you kick in too late...but i bet she'll love it too....
also mixing towards the end got lower...to me....idk
i noticed some low parts in the 1st verse too....maybe normalize everything like to 70% anywayz
hook is nice man....i think you did good
and your girl will be thankful for the input

[Slim Zaddy]

everything was well said from Bar & °[~CHR!$~]° , for me iliked the second verse more ,, it seems like everything was on control ,, and at end , the way the beat changed and you flow over it ,, it's great ,, i think she will love it ,, go ahead

[Tash8]

thank you guys

[Xray]

You already know what I think of it man, its your best track yet. Flowed well and the message was good, kinda unique how you turned out a love song into a more deep song.

[B.A.D.]

wow

its going on better and better, the story is amazing, still there are a couple times where the structure is kind of bad placed, but either way when you listen it sounds all well assigned

I like it a lot, and can't wait to hear the final version hahaha... what's with the censorded part?? hahaha

and again, some layovers need to be fixed

but keeps getting better man, your girl is going to love this

[Tash8]

I like it a lot, and can't wait to hear the final version hahaha... what's with the censorded part?? hahaha

"acting all whore for me"

but i censored it cause i assume she might be showing this to her mom or her friends or something, so i wont add that in..

[Tash8]

hey, i liked it, is there going to be another version or something .. ?

i'm going to be rerecording it and adding touching it up and shit

i mean i've been sending this track to kez and big ax-d for every phase and if u heard it the firs ttime and u hear it now it's a lot different..

i posted this one so i can get feed on it before i work more on it.

[Robbie G]

I thought you did a great job on this, especially the slow flow.

When you first started rapping i thought your voice was way too low, it sounded off. Same with the end of the track. I'm not sure if you meant it to be like that or whatever but I thought it sounded weird. Also at the end when you say:


"7 month later, and i'm still here saying
the same thing, i love you"

I can't understand the last line I had to read the text.

Just some thoughts, overall I loved it.