GO TO MY LAST POST![I CANT RAP]

[Darkblade44431]

I dont, maybe you should realize that if you think i'm "demanding" from that comment, u should also be able to think that considering i made the statement "go to my last post" on the topic title, you would most likely comment that as a demand.

[DelinQuent]

better emotion in the latest version.

i think the best emotion for this song would be a desperate sound. if you know what i mean. hard to explain.

flow still sounds off in some parts but in some spots it's decent. keep working, like spizzy said, take a song, get the instrumental, copy the flow and switch out the words but use the same cadence/flow. soon you'll have a better grasp on flow and will be able to create your own.

keep working buddy looking forward to hearing you progress.

[Darkblade44431]

Alright, thanks DQ. well...desperate sound....i'm not really feelin that, i'm thinking it should sound a bit like Proof's "Forgive Me" song, listen to that and you should know what i'm talking about. and yeh, if u look at the creative writing section, there's two songs i'm working on, "Leave Me Alone" and "Are You Real Enough?"

[Solace]

i listened to it. the rhymes were good, but your voice...it was so boring. Just no emotion. Or just talking over a sound. Good job on it tho.

[Darkblade44431]

thnx 4 feedback

[<VerbalTouch>]

actually in my eyes the lyrics were too basic after hearing it again it still needs more work like there were no dubs added at all. use those lungs.

[Darkblade44431]

lol,hope i dont end up screaming. thanks 4 feedback

[Kez]

Here's something i think you should try to stop too:

You say you're going for flows like Eminem or Proof; these are professional rappers, and you're just startin out. Plus you will get a lot more recognition if you develop your own style.

Just a bit of advice, no hate

[Kez]

Maybe so, but Eminem and Proof's flows on those tracks are hard to imitate.

[Darkblade44431]

lol, well i'm def not tryin to copy em. or proof as far as style, i think i'm trying to copy a bit the way his voice sounded in a few tracks of his. and yeah,i'm still trying 2 find my own stylem, and even though not meant, it may sound like i'm copying. however, i dont see my style as being like em's or proof. oh well, i guess i'll still put this on my mixtape, after all, it's just ideas.

[<VerbalTouch>]

copying someones flow is not a good thing its like biting someones lyrics.

[Darkblade44431]

i wasnt copying flow, just saying wanted voice to sound a bit like proof does on some songs

[<VerbalTouch>]

no one can sound like anyone truthfully you need to sound like yourself.

[Darkblade44431]

i know, ur not getting me here....Of course i sound like myself, it's my voice. I mean i wanted my emotion to sound a bit like proof let it sound in his songs..........the way he let it go into his voice.