CoBo Black - VIDEO: Goonz

[Cobo Black]

EDIT:

I re did the video I posted here, it ended up getting 11,000 views with 2000 likes, which was pretty cool...One of the biggest complaints was twhen I made it originally, the editing was choppy my lips didn't match the words sometimes so it look like bad lip syncing....so I fixed it by sliding the video over some and covering other parts up, any way, for anyone interested...here it is.

NOTE: Watch in HD - I uploaded it at 720p at a higher frame rate, if you watch it on youtubes default, it looks worse and it makes some parts look unsynced. So Click the 720p version if it doesn't by default.

http://youtu.be/SvZyvCTIUs8?hd=1


Whats up guys! I wrote a song and initially made a video to it just for fun so that I could share it with friends and it took off getting some good responses. Was looking for some feed back, maybe some constructive criticism on it to go towards the next song.

I don't really have any grandiose ideas of becoming some mega start rapper....I teach Jiu-Jitsu for a living, thats my career...rapping is just my hobby. I used to win a lot of battles and have some underground cd's out so its always been something I done and probably always will...if you love it, you love it :P

Please critique the song more than the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLbtBNke0mQ

Lyrics:
man vs wild, man vs bear..
bear gryll style wit a smile and a snare,
wit a pile of bones piled up..and microphones ground up/
into little pieces...Man I'm so fucking wound up..
Anyone I see, I'ma eat while I'm smile-ing..
look at me....I SAID LOOK AT ME, I AM/
sick of pulling teeth..
I'm the shit, and you bitches full of me!
II spit it like I'm sick and then I mix that shit wit cruelty ..
Who wanna break some rules wit me,
and get up out this zoo wit me..
rule wit me...pull a piece...
and get this bitches jewelry..
Who could be...cooler than a pool as me..
a wolverine..a wolf to sheep
so you bitches softer than some wool to me..
Now you Know -- WATCH HIM
Hows his flow? -- Awesome
How you roll? Caution, you don't want no problems
Fuck it man -- Nah Bro
Whats the plan? -- Walk Slow
Hes Comin man! Wit Hot flows, smoke'em like a marlboro's

Chorus

..I'm crazy sick/
sometimes, I don't know why I say this shit,
Feel like I shot talent, in the face, because wasted it..
I'm way too good with words, and connecting together verses, ,
Murder a person first, Let Hannibal lector serve it...
Like Make a plate,, - sweet doOd..
Take a taste -- it seems cool...
Aint it great-- wait, hes feeding me freakin people
Is it just me, or is he just being evil..
My inner meeee's an enemy,
of me being peaceful..
-I keep holding on my mic,
and closing both of my eyes
keep my pilot glasses on,
and focus on bein fly...I...
..aint going away.....ain't no way.. ain't gone happen...
Someone better grab a gun or start scrappin...
Cuz Anyone of you run at me,
wit a crew, or wit none at me..
In my view, and in front of me..
some of you, end up ug-a-ly..
Who are you, you a whut to me?
You're my food, you a lunch to me..
You mother fuckers ain't nothing,
But something stuck in my teeth..

Chorus

I'll snatch your arms and snap 'em,
And wrap 'em both in back of you,
Grab some glue, stick 'em there,
So you can't stop me smackin you,
I'll grab a bag of apples,
And bash an assholes head wit it..
Smash a Snapple on the floor,
Stab 'em with whatevers left of it..
Cuz that's what bad apples do,
And I'm rotten to the core wit it.
I don't have to practice, this rappin,
Cuz I was born with it..
As Matter a fact, the more I spit,
The more morbid and sick I get,
The more I can't ignore the gift,
The more important to record it gets,
This mic is like a gorgeous bitch,
And I like intercourse with it,
My mic's vagina's tight,
And when I rap, I give enormous dick,
I make it quit, before it rip,
and now she sorta sore and shit...
before its over, bend her over,
and make her beg for more of it..
My mic is like some mice,
And I'm a lion on the floor with it..
Its so easy for me to eat it,
I didn't even need to order it..
My mic is like some foreign shit,
And I'ma go to war wit it..
I slice it with a sword an then,
I stick a fucking fork in it.

EDIT:
feedback links:
viewtopic.php?f=38&t=130546
viewtopic.php?f=38&t=126414
viewtopic.php?f=38&t=129791

[Ticalrecords]

hey man i really liked this song, i loved your flows especially the one where you ask and answer yourself. i liked the chorus it was real catchy, the only criticism i have is that after two verses of great delivery, that third verse stuck out in a bad way, idk why but it sounded like it was a completely different rapper spitting. the video itself made me a lil queasy with all the spinning but it was still pretty cool w all the karate shit. fix that third verse n you got a solid single here.

[Cobo Black]

hey man i really liked this song, i loved your flows especially the one where you ask and answer yourself. i liked the chorus it was real catchy, the only criticism i have is that after two verses of great delivery, that third verse stuck out in a bad way, idk why but it sounded like it was a completely different rapper spitting. the video itself made me a lil queasy with all the spinning but it was still pretty cool w all the karate shit. fix that third verse n you got a solid single here.

Hey man, thanks for the reply...so what about the 3rd verse didn't you like? On my youtube page..there were people saying that it was their favorite. It had a different syntax, but this isn't uncommon to do in songs.

Can you elaborate about what you didn't like about it? Thanks! I'll return some feedback when I get home tonight for you as well if you post a link.

[B.A.D.]

you sound a lot like another member of this forum, but you got more confidence.

Man, its being a long time since I've heard some gangsta shit, Very very enjoyable, the hooks is great, the beat is great.

I can critique the mixing, your vocal is way to low and the beat seems un-mastered and low quality. But your delivery and flow makes it a great track.

I gotta say the video had me crackin' and a little iffy at first lol... but you are good man, you just need basically a bit more knowledge on quality issues.

Very enjoyable, and like I said, been a long time since I've heard this kind of hip hop so its very refreshing

[Cobo Black]

you sound a lot like another member of this forum, but you got more confidence.

Man, its being a long time since I've heard some gangsta shit, Very very enjoyable, the hooks is great, the beat is great.

I can critique the mixing, your vocal is way to low and the beat seems un-mastered and low quality. But your delivery and flow makes it a great track.

I gotta say the video had me crackin' and a little iffy at first lol... but you are good man, you just need basically a bit more knowledge on quality issues.

Very enjoyable, and like I said, been a long time since I've heard this kind of hip hop so its very refreshing

Thanks man, glad you liked. Yeah, the video initially was intended to just be something quick and simple so that I could share the song with a friend who can only watch youtube on his phone...So I half assed recorded me singing along to it after work and the gym I teach Jiu-Jitsu at.

By the time I got it home and started playing with it on my video editor..I kept tying to make it better and better and the end result was a amateur video with professional clothes on lol. Now it got 7000 views ina week and 2000 subscribers and I'm wishing I would of spent more time on it and planned it out better lol

I appreciate the love and the criticism...your absolutely right, the mastering is what I need to work on. I've always been a live freestyle battler and freestyler..so equipment is newer for me. I just recently bought Pro Tools 9 so hopefully I can start picking up some stuff.

[Nefarious]

I didnt pay much attention to the video but to me that wasnt really the important part anyways, its not my type of song really, i would say i need a song like it, but it just isnt in me to do it, your delivery didnt have many flaws at all and with your style i think i could tell why you were hoping id switch up more cuz you tend to go real crazy through ur entire verses sounds very different through out the song, i find it hard to get off one flow until im on an entire new verse sometimes but with that certain song i actually kept writing the exact same way and i rushed, i liked ur song tho and thanks for the feed.

Only bad things to say is you ended lines with "me" and "it" to much, im the kind of person who never likes to repeat one rhyme at all, even in an entire song if i can help it lol, but im also aware that, its kind of a rap style to end lines like that.

And the voice you used, i thought you couldve used more of your normal voice, i get props for sounding so much like i talk when i rap, alot of rappers tend to change theyre voices when they rap but it wasnt bad really just certain little things that i myself would notice cuz of the way i write lol.

I dont usually give ratings but, what the hell lol, 9/10

[Cobo Black]

I didnt pay much attention to the video but to me that wasnt really the important part anyways, its not my type of song really, i would say i need a song like it, but it just isnt in me to do it, your delivery didnt have many flaws at all and with your style i think i could tell why you were hoping id switch up more cuz you tend to go real crazy through ur entire verses sounds very different through out the song, i find it hard to get off one flow until im on an entire new verse sometimes but with that certain song i actually kept writing the exact same way and i rushed, i liked ur song tho and thanks for the feed.

Yeah, it wasn't a "Flaw" in your music, it was just MY PERSONAL criticism. I think it is a matter of taste really.

Only bad things to say is you ended lines with "me" and "it" to much, im the kind of person who never likes to repeat one rhyme at all, even in an entire song if i can help it lol, but im also aware that, its kind of a rap style to end lines like that.

Yeah, I don't mind doing it, as long as its an anchor word and the word or words before it are different.

Code: Select all

And the voice you used, i thought you couldve used more of your normal voice, i get props for sounding so much like i talk when i rap, alot of rappers tend to change theyre voices when they rap but it wasnt bad really just certain little things that i myself would notice cuz of the way i write lol.

Yeah, I can agree with that....but for me that can also be dependent on the mood and the song. I would agree with others, it works really well for you and it sounds really good.

I dont usually give ratings but, what the hell lol, 9/10

'preciate it pimp, a lot! Thanks.

[BigBoss]

did you go into a random locker room with a camera and just record yourself?

[Cobo Black]

:y:



did you go into a random locker room with a camera and just record yourself?

No...I teach Jiu-Jitsu at Gracie Barra, I have my own locker room and keys to our gym....so..yeah...I guess you can prolly pick your smiley face off the floor and stop laughing now lol.

[BigBoss]

:y:



did you go into a random locker room with a camera and just record yourself?

No...I teach Jiu-Jitsu at Gracie Barra, I have my own locker room and keys to our gym....so..yeah...I guess you can prolly pick your smiley face off the floor and stop laughing now.

calm your big dick down broseph, i liked your fucking song

[Cobo Black]

:y:



did you go into a random locker room with a camera and just record yourself?

No...I teach Jiu-Jitsu at Gracie Barra, I have my own locker room and keys to our gym....so..yeah...I guess you can prolly pick your smiley face off the floor and stop laughing now.

calm your big dick down broseph, i liked your fucking song

Yeah, I saw the Thumbs Up, thats weird, I added an "lol" at the end of it so that you would know I was joking being a smart ass. I don't think they updated the edit.

[mdemaz]

Beat was meh, but your flow and warm voice cancels it out.

By the way, how long have you been doing martial arts?
I'm going on 6 years.

[Cobo Black]

Beat was meh, but your flow and warm voice cancels it out.

By the way, how long have you been doing martial arts?
I'm going on 6 years.

I've been doing Martial arts since I was 5, so 24 years =) What all do you train in?

I'm a Purple Belt in Jiu-Jitsu under Draculino and teach at Gracie Barra Texas
I'm a Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do under Joo Om
and I've done some Boxing and a little bit of Muay Thai.

Here is the Youtube Channel I run for our school
http://www.youtube.com/user/DraculinoTeamTx

Everyone calls me Poppa Rotzee because I'm always filming when I'm not training. lol

[mdemaz]

Beat was meh, but your flow and warm voice cancels it out.

By the way, how long have you been doing martial arts?
I'm going on 6 years.

I've been doing Martial arts since I was 5, so 24 years =) What all do you train in?

I'm a Purple Belt in Jiu-Jitsu under Draculino and teach at Gracie Barra Texas
I'm a Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do under Joo Om
and I've done some Boxing and a little bit of Muay Thai.

Here is the Youtube Channel I run for our school
http://www.youtube.com/user/DraculinoTeamTx

Everyone calls me Poppa Rotzee because I'm always filming when I'm not training. lol

Fucken word...
I know a modernized style of Kung Fu and traditional Karate.

Black belt is highly impressive..That shit isn't easy..I never bothered getting to that level of hierarchy..
Mainly because people used to spar over belts..And the more fights you won and classes you pass, the higher rank your belt becomes etc..
The house I trained in ages ago got demolished..So I just train at home now in the gym.

I fought a few black belts and I've only beaten 1 out of 100...I guess I'm just another sheep in the flock.
Anyway, sick song, keep swagging.

[Cobo Black]

Beat was meh, but your flow and warm voice cancels it out.

By the way, how long have you been doing martial arts?
I'm going on 6 years.

I've been doing Martial arts since I was 5, so 24 years =) What all do you train in?

I'm a Purple Belt in Jiu-Jitsu under Draculino and teach at Gracie Barra Texas
I'm a Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do under Joo Om
and I've done some Boxing and a little bit of Muay Thai.

Here is the Youtube Channel I run for our school
http://www.youtube.com/user/DraculinoTeamTx

Everyone calls me Poppa Rotzee because I'm always filming when I'm not training. lol

Fucken word...
I know a modernized style of Kung Fu and traditional Karate.

Black belt is highly impressive..That shit isn't easy..I never bothered getting to that level of hierarchy..
Mainly because people used to spar over belts..And the more fights you won and classes you pass, the higher rank your belt becomes etc..
The house I trained in ages ago got demolished..So I just train at home now in the gym.

I fought a few black belts and I've only beaten 1 out of 100...I guess I'm just another sheep in the flock.
Anyway, sick song, keep swagging.

Thanks man, I appreciate it.