Spyder - For Better, For Worse

[Spyder]

Link Of Feed
For Better, For Worse


Lately ive been conversating with voices in my head
Contemplating if the right choice is blissful death.
This white noise has both my wrists in glistening red
Get bored, and decide to tie the mic cord around my neck.
But a subtle life source fights forward and interjects,
I hate the thought of a psyche ward so I get in bed.
Put on my apnea mask, see if sleep can actually grasp
Hand me them Ambien, see if I can crash or relax.
The room begins to spin, damn, not this shit again
Look to the mirror and see my reflections twisted grin.
I approach it and I notice his movements don’t mimic me,
No mask, he just continues to stare so sadistically.
watch as he paces cause hes trapped in this prison see
I look closer and he seems to look a little differently,
A younger, more confident and bit thinner me,
I reach out, he grabs my wrists. Heard you were missin me?

Hook – x2
I tried to leave you behind but forever im cursed
Your in every rhyme and in every verse
Youll never leave me, til we rest in the hearse
Cause your with me forever, for better, for worse

Actually, just the opposite finally im on top of it
Oh? Is that why you let me go and called it quits?
Im not your problem kid, look at where this fuckin bottom hits
Like me to stop? Like it or not I got accomplishments.
Stop this shit, secrets, what do you need me to tell?
Well for starters it don’t look like your sleeping too well.
Poppin pills, droppin skills all because of me
Id love you back on your feet, id keep you company.
I member your fits, wouldn’t take shit from nobody
If its wasn’t for me theyd never come to your shows probably.
Leavin you behind was the smartest thing I ever did
You didn’t give me my style man I was blessed with it.
Please, everyone on TR watched and mocked your spit
If it wasn’t for Anonymous youd still be droppin shit.
Thanks to him and I, you now have a place in the game
Isnt that right Spyder, think why I gave you that name!

Hook – x2
I tried to leave you behind but forever im cursed
Your in every rhyme and in every verse
Youll never leave me, til we rest in the hearse
Cause your with me forever, for better, for worse

Listen I locked you away, held up, boxed in a cage
You want to come back and yet you mock me today?
Probably not the way to work yourself back to my heart,
Now you dab in my art? Shits like a stab in the dark.
TJ it was me who grabbed at those charts, actin so hard
Ive been watching, did you think that we’d actually part?
Ive been with you this whole time, Now im gonna resurface
Why? Cause the shit in your verses, is worthless
What did I do to earn this, I want to erase your memory
Its seems happy and alone is something I can never be.
Trust me Spyder lonely and sad days are behind you
Need I remind you, “ive never met anyone like you.”
I admit we had some laughs and I was king of the castle
And with these pills I cant seem to get the swing of the hassle,
Maybe I should get out, just don’t last when you come,
Relax Spyder, sit tight and lets get back to the fun.

[12characters]

it's set to private?

[dkhp77]

it's set to private?

yes

[Spyder]

god damn, ight hold on

edited with new link, please feed

[Solace]

I haven't listened but just reading the lyrics it seems like an entire My Darling rip off but worse...And that's not a good sign.

[Spyder]

perhaps you should listen. it is that vibe but imo the lyrics are more sound that My Darling as Em was just goofin off.

my do you only comment on pieces you think are bad. especially without listening lol

yet my other pieces like Lonely at the Top you dont feed.

i dont care about your opinion, constructive feedback or... peace

[Solace]

It is constructive to imply not to bite a hugely known rapper. And I listened to it now, and it sounded exactly like you were trying to copy Eminem. Like, there is no doubt you just tried to copy him. Make an alter ego. Talk about taking drugs and how they've ruined your ability to rap. Hmm. Have a back and forth with "yourself" and you put your pitch lower. Somewhat a sung hook (which, by the way, is the only thing that I feel is decent about this but you could definitely work with it some more; you seemed to do well with the structure of that hook. You just need to pace yourself more so). Sound familiar? It's not a "vibe" it's a blatant rip off.

And I only comment on pieces I think are bad because every piece that I've heard of yours I think is bad, so it's not really my fault.

[Spyder]

well of course the "alter ego" is a bite off of Em but ive wrote as Insomniac for a while, and thats personal subject not just because thats what Em talks about.

thanks for the feed on the hook, glad you liked it.

any you may think that but you must admit my flow is on now everytime, and my delivery has come up leaps.
there has to be aspects you dont think are bad. i understand you may not like everything i do or a whole track as a package. but saying you hate everything about every track? cmon

[Steve Spag]

Other than what Solace already said about the Em thing, I enjoyed the track minus the hook, just didn't really blend well with the verses. Your delivery could be a bit more lively, but it could be worse, so it's not that bad. Rhyming is good, nothing crazy but what you have matches the beat and overall vibe so that's cool. Keep it at man!

[Spyder]

thanks bro ill rtf on ur new track soon

[Steve Spag]

No problem man, just check my new tape when you got the time since that last track is on it;
viewtopic.php?f=76&t=143489

[Solace]

well of course the "alter ego" is a bite off of Em but ive wrote as Insomniac for a while, and thats personal subject not just because thats what Em talks about.

Sure seems like Insomniac talked the same exact way the Slim Shady persona did in My Darling

any you may think that but you must admit my flow is on now everytime, and my delivery has come up leaps.
there has to be aspects you dont think are bad. i understand you may not like everything i do or a whole track as a package. but saying you hate everything about every track? cmon

There are not any aspects I don't think are bad, but definitely hear me out on this one. You have grasped flow, and you're on beat. It's still shaky, with the many odd syllables here and there. Flow is difficult, and I myself am working towards finally understanding it. Your delivery is still pretty weak. And it may just me being difficult to please, but even a smooth generic flow with the comfortable delivery is merely "ok". "Good", and "Great" comes in when you do better than expected, with well flowed rhyme schemes, the perfect delivery, and so forth. So yeah.

[Spyder]

thanks for the feed sol, thats what im lookin for man. sayin u hate it before the listen isnt constructive but ur last post was so thanks for that

and geno, thanks for the compliment on the audio and lyircal aspect. but yes i admitted it was like My Darling it was just something to try and fuck around with

[Spyder]

word

[B.A.D.]

hey man, I cheched this song the other day, just didnt had time to feed,

your quality has improved, but still needs work, the beat is too loud compared to your voice. specially on the second verse, third verse is better.

I loved the concept, reminded me a of an Eminem song, "my darling", looks like a carbon copy tbh. But its still enjoyable I guess

Your voice sounds really dope with that pitch alterting, very gangsta, you could even adopt that as your rap voice lol, your flow needs work man, sometimes you nail it beautifully but sometimes its very monotone and sounds like you are just speaking, not actually rapping. You need to go along with the beat and catch the flow.

I see that you fixed your layover problem, however on the hook the layovers are still messy

anyways, this is clearly an improvement, and yeah, keep going man, its good