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Spyder - Undefeatable

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Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Spyder » Aug 2nd, '14, 20:10

LOF = viewtopic.php?f=38&t=172744

single from my upcoming tape :y:
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props to Marko44

https://soundcloud.com/spydermusicchann ... defeatable

at all costs I’m in to win it though its labeled me a cynic
even though we play the same game they just don’t admit it.
a scapegoats where I fit in so I take the role I’m given
so I play those instrumentals and take notes how they’re written.
yeah one day ima show em so they know I out spit em
feeling like I'm caged though, volcano how living,
I try not to wallow but I cannot keep it bottled up,
I got the wedding ring, sometimes everything is not enough.
maybe my life's not as rough as some out there will do
but its the hardest thing I've done, got nothing to compare it to.
feeling like I missed the class you learn all your merits through
I'm only honing the moments that make it so unbearable.
I can help others lives, just not my own
thinking forwards strides but its so stop and go
sorry baby this pain is something I cannot control
I’m ready lock and load but the games got my soul.


Yeah my backs to the wall but I do not fall or fade
Fists, ball of rage nothing can make me wash away.
Not today, waiting til this stockade drops away
Go till the lock breaks and then im gone and changed,
I know they don’t matter ever and raps so influential
Match those instrumentals vocals smashin on them symbols.
I know you listen back and think that its oh so simple
But the fact is that you’ve never had them laugh at your credentials
Ill get to splattering their temples, how I see it in my dreams
Say nay to the haters til they are pleased with all my schemes,
Don’t need these fickle fiends feeding on my needs
Youre in for a long night you keep sleeping on my piece.
What they say it stays, wherever I go
I could probably quit, would be better I know
But music is the tool that tethers my soul
So for stay or go, I chose the devil I know.


Pick myself up, brushed off til the dust is gone
All this energy I mustered, bring it fucking on.
Was knocked down tumbled stopped but it wasn’t long
Kept going dusk til dawn, til my names on the Jumbotron.
Now im the juggernaut, yeah and you are fucking not
Put my faith into something but it wasn’t God.
Said I could do it myself, don’t need a helping hand
I am ready, faith in me I win being a betting man.
Got this boulder on my shoulders shit is heavy damn,
Plans set steady and, I am ready for the reprimand.
See another outcome guess again, worlds mine for the taking
Lines innovating, timeless debating
On every rhyme I am saying, and whose spine it is breaking
So even if you were to rewind, you’d see the same thing.
If I give into it, then the pressure wont go
But never will I fold, this is forever my show.
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Spyder » Aug 3rd, '14, 22:28

Not even an accent bro.

Care to drop real feed?
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Eedee » Aug 5th, '14, 00:11

You had some sick lines, and the flow was a lot better than your past stuff. That hook is pretty sick too IMO.

But your flow/smoothness/delivery falters a bit sometimes.

yeah one day ima show em so they know I out spit em
feeling like I'm caged though, volcano how living,
I try not to wallow but I cannot keep it bottled up,
I got the wedding ring, sometimes everything is not enough.

^ For example. You had some weird pauses and words were delivered "lumpy"-like lol.
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby EvryOnesACrtc » Aug 5th, '14, 00:39

Spyder wrote:Not even an accent bro.

Care to drop real feed?


Seriously, forget that guy. Moron.

Man, that chorus is nicee. I know you had nothing to do with it, but had to be said. Overall, the track was good, but you need to put more emotion into it. I feel like you're just reading it off something instead of talking to me, naw mean? Also, don't worry so much about emphasizing your rhymes. It's coming off like you just wanna show off how clever you are with your multies, and your delivery is suffering because of it. You've got the lines, now just emphasize 'em.

Btw, don't think I didn't notice you jackin' that juggernaut/jumbo tron rhyme from Em's 'Groundhog Day' lmao jk
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Spyder » Aug 5th, '14, 03:42

Thanks for the feed guys. Glad I'm improving, I got some other tracks that the beat was a little simpler so I flowed better I hope. Yeah still working on my delivery definitely.

And haha didn't even catch that, don't listen much cause the first half annoys me ;)

Appreciate the feed fam.

Eedee you still hoping on that track?
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Mr.DGAF » Aug 10th, '14, 04:29

like everyone said, hook is dope. first verses flow is dope at times and iffy at others. the first few bars sound like theyre hitting just a tad early. like the cadence is fine you just placed it a little early. "feeling like I'm caged" you kinda slurred a bit, my only complaint on delivery for the first verse. maybe the "take notes" bar as well haha. your flow straightens out really well for the bottled up bar all the way to the end of the not enough line. layers are kinda off at the end of the verse too.

second verse the flow is pretty good for most of the verse. "influential" delivery sounded like you mispronounced it or something haha. the see it in my dreams/pleased with all my schemes bars didn't flow very well, at least imo. kinda carry on a bit too long but it's not really off beat so I guess it's just my personal preference. the sleeping on my piece line was dope. The last four bars though are pretty weird. you structure them weird so the verse just kinda ends outta nowhere. also the layers are a bit off most of the verse.

verse three's got a cool delivery in the opening. you slur a few words but overall this is the best verse of the song. flow is on point pretty much all the way. the reprimand line flowed really well. not much to complain about on this verse.

overall the song is pretty cool. some minor shit holds it back, gotta line those layers on the verses better and try and flow like you did in the third verse. looking forward to the tape.
You'd be surprised...
How many truths you can hide in flows

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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Spyder » Aug 10th, '14, 17:59

Thanks for the peep man
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Jaba » Aug 11th, '14, 01:07

Fucking dope! We need 2 collab!
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Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
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Re: Spyder - Undefeatable

Postby Spyder » Aug 11th, '14, 22:58

Ya man hit me with a beat.
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