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Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

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Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Jaba » Oct 28th, '14, 22:58

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"Back To The Rhyme" is the next single off my 4 - 5 track EP "The Mythos EP".

Credits -
Myself for recording the song/writing the 1st and 3rd verse.
Python for writing the 2nd verse and mixing the track.
Some guy on youtube (found the beat on youtube) for the beat.
Myself for making the single artwork.

Song link -
https://soundcloud.com/jaba2/01-back-to-the-rhyme

Feedback/constructive criticism is welcome. I am really working hard to make a good Ep. I hope this song is good and an improvement from my last song. I am not trying to be a rapper, but I really want to put out something good (I do this for fun). I will be releasing a 4 to 5 track (idk yet) EP in November and then an LP in December probably. I am working really hard so please give this a chance and give me good criticism/feedback. Also, gonna be honest, listened to this when it was finished, I do go off flow a lil bit, and some of the rhymes are corny as hell, Ill be trying to improve on my LP and on the other songs from the EP. Also I admit, the mixing isnt the best, partly cus of my mic, but also cus Python rushed the fuck out of it. Thanks for even listening!

Lyrics -
[Verse 1 (0:17-1:28)]
Having a tough time finding myself
My own style, and ways to grab attention and gain some wealth,
So many comparisons, always compared to Eminem
But it's not intentional, I'm not tryna sound like him
Problem is, thats all I've listened to in the past 10 years
So who you expect me to sound like then?
(Rap more like Atone!) What?! No!
You hear me? Am I not speaking clearly enough, or is it just that my mic stinks? Shit!
It sucks not knowing where your going and not having a direction to go in, in this life
Especially when you're in the middle of a fuckin' identity crisis
(My name is Hopsin for Christ's sakes!)
You can't write any lyrics, you have no creativity
No sense of humor, you take everything seriously
Come on Jaba, what the fuck were you thinking with that Trapped EP?
Actually thinking it was dope and people could use it to cope
If you were alone then, you are now, for sure, no one's gonna respect you
After that shit, I can't respect myself
But at least you got a few friends, Pyth Wonder's fucking in this shit
(Step off, BITCH!)
Eedee put out that White Noise CD, thought we were cool but I didn't get no feature!
He fucked me over! What the fuck, Eedee?
Nah, I fucking tricked you, faggot, it's all about the mission to go
using new flows to show my thoughts and make you go
piss your pants, these are my rants (BITCH!)

[Bridge]
Back to the rhyme again!

[Verse 2 (1:31-2:41)]
I'm in hysterics right now because I'm too generic to think of a rhyme
Everytime I try something new I go barbaric and crawl back scared, into my shell
Atmospheric as hell, though, and making sure awareness is dealt
Probably because all my self loathing is buried in Hell
Just want to get heard, that's why I'm so weary to sell
Schizophrenic because this bitch is as sick as an epidemic
Pathetic and not quite academic, but shit, I think it's genetics
Don't fret yet, I'm gonna become systemic soon
That's when they all freak out and feel afraid
Insecurity resulted in because I fought to steal the stage
Wielding pain within these rants yet I'm still okay
Cause rap's just a secret identity, a way to express how I feel without attacking others
Over a sick beat, shit, I still got things to discover
I turn some numb fuckin' tragic shit into some puzzling magic
You need to stop jerking off to underage anime gals, breh!
Do that before you tell me I'm nothing but trash, bitch!
Make your dumb fuckin' fatass admit that you are a cumguzzling faggot!
I may be possessed by repetitiveness 
But I’m not out of creativeness 
I'm in a slump and I'm not as pumped up as usual
I'm fucked and I'm running out of fuel to make new songs!
(SIKE!)

[Bridge]
Back to the rhyme again!

Verse 3 (2:37 - )
Back to the rhyme again
you know I always pack a pen
Im creative look it my albums a 10
Crack jokes in my rhymes im a comedian
unpack all my plaques im not wack stupid men
when you talk shit it offends me to listen
listen to you cluck but your just a hen
you dont bother me ill just fuck you up now again
your a fake fucker thats why i saw you on top 10 espn fails
are even a male? can you pay your fee when you sin and get thrown in jail
or you gotta get your bitch to pay it for ya once again
on a scale from 1 to 10, how often do you break your nails gwen?
Why do i give you attention? Better yet why do i give you permission
to talk at all
talk to me nah fuck you talk to a wall
my rhymes will make you walk and fall
get back on your feet but then your socks are off
i spit cus i love it, i spit cus im sick,
i cough when i drop bars hard as brick walls
im dangerous dont call me, i do crazy shit for fun
like put a stick in your dick tip, i bet your having a ball
(haha) i can do it all, beat ur ass in a brawl, then make you bawl
like a baby you can crawl but you cant run
whatcha gonna do son? whatcha gonna do baby doll
im wicked on the mic, we are not alike
tick tock the time has come, i spit my shit
my time is done, it was written bitch
shit fucker i hope you know im kiddin
you cant ever stop me, you cant knock me down
try to hit me bitch but you can go to town
you can try to rap but you cant explain a noun
man fuck this crazy wack rap shit, i guess im done for NOW!

Feed:
viewtopic.php?f=38&t=174642&p=2818633#p2818633
Image
Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Eedee » Oct 31st, '14, 00:41

Yeah what the fuck Eedee lol

Your flow is still not smooth BUT you are getting the hang of not being choppy. You still deliver some lines/words in weird ways when it was starting to sound smooth on the drums haha. But tbh you are getting the delivery/flow thing down. Definitely better than your last song(s). Actually, the more I listen the more I like your delivery on this. It sounds like you are finally getting a bit more comfy with your own voice and the way you rap. Just gotta work on that smoothness of the way you connect your bars.
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Jaba » Oct 31st, '14, 02:13

Eedee wrote:Yeah what the fuck Eedee lol

Your flow is still not smooth BUT you are getting the hang of not being choppy. You still deliver some lines/words in weird ways when it was starting to sound smooth on the drums haha. But tbh you are getting the delivery/flow thing down. Definitely better than your last song(s). Actually, the more I listen the more I like your delivery on this. It sounds like you are finally getting a bit more comfy with your own voice and the way you rap. Just gotta work on that smoothness of the way you connect your bars.

Yeah, tbh I was listening to this and the more I do im like ehhhhh, theirs some corny ass lines. But yeah the flows getting better. I have recorded some other songs as well and i think the flow is better than this. Thanks for the feed :y:
Image
Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
User avatar
Jaba
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby DetroitSkills » Oct 31st, '14, 10:40

Cover > song. Its ok doe
MMLP2 11.5.13
#teamEncore #teamEllenPage
"Enough rhymes to maybe try to help get some people through tough times
But I gotta keep a few punchlines just in case cause even you unsigned
Rappers are hungry looking at me like it's lunch time"
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby SarkingMajor » Nov 9th, '14, 12:26

Not too bad, needs a bit of work on flow. Also, turn the beat down a bit haha.
Image

Eminem wrote:Sarking Major is 11/10 signing him to Shady records in 2015


True Wiz wrote:Damn, SarkingMajor can out rap half of you TR rappers :whew:

I'd work on your delivery a little though. Your flow was amazing in some parts man :y:

You could be the new Luna C in a few years


MattyB is GOAT anybody who says otherwise is just a dumb hater
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Jaba » Nov 9th, '14, 17:20

True Wiz wrote:
SarkingMajor wrote:Not too bad, needs a bit of work on flow. Also, turn the beat down a bit haha.

I see you've found Jaba

Stick away before you're corrupted

Looks like True Wiz is mad about what I said to Atone. lol

Nah but Pyth mixed this song. He isnt mixing any of the others
Image
Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
User avatar
Jaba
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby SarkingMajor » Nov 9th, '14, 17:23

True Wiz wrote:
SarkingMajor wrote:Not too bad, needs a bit of work on flow. Also, turn the beat down a bit haha.

I see you've found Jaba

Stick away before you're corrupted


lol
Image

Eminem wrote:Sarking Major is 11/10 signing him to Shady records in 2015


True Wiz wrote:Damn, SarkingMajor can out rap half of you TR rappers :whew:

I'd work on your delivery a little though. Your flow was amazing in some parts man :y:

You could be the new Luna C in a few years


MattyB is GOAT anybody who says otherwise is just a dumb hater
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby SarkingMajor » Nov 9th, '14, 17:56

tbh
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Image

Eminem wrote:Sarking Major is 11/10 signing him to Shady records in 2015


True Wiz wrote:Damn, SarkingMajor can out rap half of you TR rappers :whew:

I'd work on your delivery a little though. Your flow was amazing in some parts man :y:

You could be the new Luna C in a few years


MattyB is GOAT anybody who says otherwise is just a dumb hater
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Jaba » Nov 9th, '14, 23:22

True Wiz wrote:I don't understand why it's so hard for people to flow? Like damn, just count your syllables.

Its not hard. Its just hard to get people to like your flow.

EDIT:
Wiz, focus on your beats and not me. If you dont like me, dont listen to me, all i can say. Im doin this shit for fun, so whether people like it or not im still gonna do it in my spare time for the hell of it. Focus on those beats if your gonna do that shit for a job cus what ive heard their wack. If ur doin it for fun tho, cool. Shit balls ass.
Image
Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
User avatar
Jaba
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby SarkingMajor » Nov 10th, '14, 00:16

Jaba wrote:
True Wiz wrote:I don't understand why it's so hard for people to flow? Like damn, just count your syllables.

Its not hard. Its just hard to get people to like your flow.

EDIT:
Wiz, focus on your beats and not me. If you dont like me, dont listen to me, all i can say. Im doin this shit for fun, so whether people like it or not im still gonna do it in my spare time for the hell of it. Focus on those beats if your gonna do that shit for a job cus what ive heard their wack. If ur doin it for fun tho, cool. Shit balls ass.


Come on man, we both know thats not true. Wiz is wack? Come off it. Also dont post to a public forum and start crying when you get feedback.
Image

Eminem wrote:Sarking Major is 11/10 signing him to Shady records in 2015


True Wiz wrote:Damn, SarkingMajor can out rap half of you TR rappers :whew:

I'd work on your delivery a little though. Your flow was amazing in some parts man :y:

You could be the new Luna C in a few years


MattyB is GOAT anybody who says otherwise is just a dumb hater
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Jaba » Nov 10th, '14, 00:40

SarkingMajor wrote:
Jaba wrote:
True Wiz wrote:I don't understand why it's so hard for people to flow? Like damn, just count your syllables.

Its not hard. Its just hard to get people to like your flow.

EDIT:
Wiz, focus on your beats and not me. If you dont like me, dont listen to me, all i can say. Im doin this shit for fun, so whether people like it or not im still gonna do it in my spare time for the hell of it. Focus on those beats if your gonna do that shit for a job cus what ive heard their wack. If ur doin it for fun tho, cool. Shit balls ass.


Come on man, we both know thats not true. Wiz is wack? Come off it. Also dont post to a public forum and start crying when you get feedback.

Im not crying because I got feedback. Wiz is being a complete dick because I was mean to his butt-buddy Atone. I dont want assholes giving me feedback. Constructive criticism is nice. And Sark your pretty new so dont tell me what to do.
Image
Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
User avatar
Jaba
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Location: The Hospital trying to find a Brain...
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Eedee » Nov 10th, '14, 02:28

Dam, ya'll need to take a chill pill.
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby mdemaz » Nov 10th, '14, 02:30

smh
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s/o to Eedee Python CP Horse Snake Pain SaJn Silver Cement Excitaz PK Rolly GW EG Charlotte Kasia Mel Wiz Solace TRex SliK Aone Atone Trimss Menzo Geno Fish Jaba Detroit Blogs Based lil_b IBR DA! Mono ROM NRG Bigray Hesky Francesco Yoda Noddy Raul
Just Silver wrote:I think every guy should massage their prostate at least once

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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby Jaba » Nov 10th, '14, 02:35

True Wiz wrote:
Jaba wrote:Wiz is being a complete dick because I was mean to his butt-buddy Atone.

Now, I think that's a stretch lol

Also, it's hard to give constructive criticism when the majority of your previous work was written by someone else.

Majority? ONE SONG "Voices" was the only ghost written song. The rest have been all me. (Besides 1 verse on this song). Anyways Python is a fucking faggot and I do not like him now tbh, he just pisses me off. So like I said in my other thread, I am writing everything on my own again.
Image
Singin' "Bagpipes from Baghdad" again
In my dad's drag draggin' a faggot in a Glad bag
Won't be the last time I make a dramatic entrance like that again
You thought I was lyin' when I said I think that I'm crossin' the line again
I've lost my mind, caution oh God I think I've just thought of another fucking line
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
But hip hop has left me brainwashed with a violent streak
User avatar
Jaba
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Location: The Hospital trying to find a Brain...
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Re: Back to The Rhyme (Single off my upcoming EP)

Postby mdemaz » Nov 10th, '14, 02:37

these niggas
ImageImageImage
s/o to Eedee Python CP Horse Snake Pain SaJn Silver Cement Excitaz PK Rolly GW EG Charlotte Kasia Mel Wiz Solace TRex SliK Aone Atone Trimss Menzo Geno Fish Jaba Detroit Blogs Based lil_b IBR DA! Mono ROM NRG Bigray Hesky Francesco Yoda Noddy Raul
Just Silver wrote:I think every guy should massage their prostate at least once

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