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Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

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Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 03:24

Alright. Its my 2nd audio track (its a remake of my first one as well). For those who think my voice sounds young, well I'm only 13 so yeah. Ice Killa put a lot of effort in this too, i made him re-do the mixing about 20 times lol. And since i can hear my voice sounds weak as fuck, im gunna re-record my verse next week or so and then re-release it :)

Song Download:
http://www.zshare.net/audio/53617361f12ca041/

Lyrics:

[Verse 1: Epiphany]
You're a rapper that's sick? You should stop lying,
You're just going to "write lyrics or bite trying",
We rip through your shit with hardcore flows,
We bully you with our style, no need for sticks and stones,
So go home, you tried, me & Ice won't deny it,
Come back and diss us? No, don't even try it,
Run circles around you, you wouldn't believe,
So fast you'd think it was a fuckin' track meet,
With your wack beats, attempts will be feeble,
You're paltry, we look over you like a fuckin' steeple,
Your lyrics are beneath me just like your mother,
These lyrics are a battlefield, you running for cover,
Can't take you serious, you sound like a comedian,
Listen to this verse, oh shit look who got beat again!

[Chorus]
Lyrically on fire, we'll burn u down,
Just like the World Trade Center when it fell to the ground,
You can't fuck with the lyrics we spit,
Try and bite and we'll feed you this lyrical clip.

[Verse 2: Ice Killa]
Yo, Epiphany, let me jump right in,
I got a few things to say to this bumpkin,
Yo, you think you can really roll with this,
Lyrical shit that we vehemantly spit,
You're nothing to this so don't come back and diss,
u a speck in the dust, the rest is just luck,
no talent u suck, on a mic u quack like a duck
let me crack a few bucks,
some 380's if u want to get fucked
You think you're sick, your just in denial,
You nothing but a pedophile trying to bite our style,
we fight with flows while u choke on blows,
we in control, we hardcore and cold,
Ur nothing but a cocky chicken, laying eggs in front of us,
I don't talk shit, i pop shit like a blunderbuss,
don't call me spittin' gangster, if u ain't one yourself,
I'm top dog bitch, you sitting on the bottom shelf,
and i don't need punchlines to lyrically murder you,
You say you're off the charts but I ain't never heard of you.

[Chorus]

Comments are appreciated, and maybe some suggestions on how to work my delivery :)

FOR THE ORIGINAL TRACK OF THIS
(As i stated before, this is a remake of the original)
Download Original
Last edited by Solace on Jan 3rd, '09, 05:27, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby MC Anonymous » Jan 3rd, '09, 03:38

IceKilla did overall better then Shadymademe on this one.
Shadymademe your verse lacked emotion, flow, delivery, everything
IceKilla you had nice delivery and flow, but lyrics were average.
Overall the track wasn't BAD, but it wasn't GOOD either.
It was average, 6/10. Keep dropping though. :y:
LMFAO@ Brittney, bitch looking worse than a chupacabra mixed with a broken down coyote. You're disgusting ugly, so ugly in fact, my brain simultaneously exploded while processing how bitterly grotesque you look. I would much rather stick ice picks into the walls of my cranium, then stick my dick into your quagmire of a clitoris. You're what would happen if a sperm whale mated with a Godzilla fish..


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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby gladimnotsoluble » Jan 3rd, '09, 03:40

To be honest I did not like this at all :unsure:

Both of your voices were extremely weak

And Epiphany you need a lot of work with your flow, even though on paper some of your shit rhymes, when you spit it it's not even rhyming because your flow is so strange.

The chorus was infinitely lame too, and it sounded terrible, along with the pause before it.

I'm not trying to be mean or anything--but the voices annoyed me all throughout, rhymes were average at best, flows were terrible = not a very good song.

However, Epiphany you got a cool voice, you can definitely spit louder and harder and you can actually be pretty sick--work on that flow and you'll be good.




Hope you accept my honesty. And keep dropping.
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 04:09

MC Anonymous wrote:IceKilla did overall better then Shadymademe on this one.
Shadymademe your verse lacked emotion, flow, delivery, everything
IceKilla you had nice delivery and flow, but lyrics were average.
Overall the track wasn't BAD, but it wasn't GOOD either.
It was average, 6/10. Keep dropping though. :y:

Yeah i agree, his emotion was good and his flow was nice as well while I was lacking. Im glad you checked and i appreciate your feed man :y: I'll keep trying :)

gladimnotsoluble wrote:To be honest I did not like this at all :unsure:

Both of your voices were extremely weak

And Epiphany you need a lot of work with your flow, even though on paper some of your shit rhymes, when you spit it it's not even rhyming because your flow is so strange.

The chorus was infinitely lame too, and it sounded terrible, along with the pause before it.

I'm not trying to be mean or anything--but the voices annoyed me all throughout, rhymes were average at best, flows were terrible = not a very good song.

However, Epiphany you got a cool voice, you can definitely spit louder and harder and you can actually be pretty sick--work on that flow and you'll be good.




Hope you accept my honesty. And keep dropping.


i'm glad you checked, and gave feed. I can accept your honesty, in fact i was looking out for people to give honest feed because without it, I wouldnt be able to improve. Ill try spitting louder, and harder as well next time this verse is recorded. Ill hopefully fix the flow too next time.
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 04:57

Chet Starr wrote:Sounds so familiar :shifty:

Love how your voice sounds, flow is nothing special, need some more emotions. Didn't like the pause lol

Chorus doesn't sound good, You & Ice don't sound good mixed together.

Ice good energy! Rhymes were ok, but I enjoyed the verse :)

Good improvement Shadymademe, I liked it. But I like alot of weird stuff :unsure:

lmao thanks man :) i need to try harder on my delivery, i know. does anyone have any suggestions other than rap it louder and clearer? since no one likes the pause, next time i get ice to mix it ill take the pause out. Blame the chorus on ice, it was his idea :shifty: lol thanks and glad you like it (even if it is weird ;) )
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Requiem » Jan 3rd, '09, 05:09

LMAO, thx for the comments guys ;) shadymademe, u should post a link to the original, so people can see the improvement.
my honest feed back on the track (completely biased cuz i'm on it :shifty: ) -
i thought it was good. for our first real collaboration, the suck ass attempt before it doesn't count :tounge2:
i mean, certianly u have an awkward flow, it's your second damn track. and ur doing great for ur second track. i've been doing it for a while, so it's obvious mine would sound somewhat better. i think ur future is looking good :y:
i'll mix it again :( lmao, can't really help the pause, i looped the beat. sajjad, or tash, hell any producer can tell u how hard it is to loop an already made beat. because it has to fit, and sound right. cuz the piano, violins and shit in the background made it hard as HELL to loop right. so :tounge2:
overall i give it a 7.5/10

room for improvement, but still a great start to a future of rhyming/collabing.

mwa ha ha, 3 Knights is coming :shifty:
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 05:19

why would you feed your own track :unsure: and you post the original cause i dont have it :sweating:
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Requiem » Jan 3rd, '09, 05:22

^ i only fed ur verse, and talked about the beat mainly :sweating:

http://www.zshare.net/audio/53377326b9050870/
^the original, ressurected yet again :shifty:

put it in the original post :8)
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 05:28

IceKilla wrote:^ i only fed ur verse, and talked about the beat mainly :sweating:

http://www.zshare.net/audio/53377326b9050870/
^the original, ressurected yet again :shifty:

put it in the original post :8)

mmkay :)
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby gladimnotsoluble » Jan 3rd, '09, 06:21

IceKilla wrote:^ i only fed ur verse, and talked about the beat mainly :sweating:

http://www.zshare.net/audio/53377326b9050870/
^the original, ressurected yet again :shifty:

put it in the original post :8)




Huge improvement :worship: over this
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 06:40

gladimnotsoluble wrote:
IceKilla wrote:^ i only fed ur verse, and talked about the beat mainly :sweating:

http://www.zshare.net/audio/53377326b9050870/
^the original, ressurected yet again :shifty:

put it in the original post :8)




Huge improvement :worship: over this

Glad to hear it, haha :)
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Slim Zaddy » Jan 3rd, '09, 09:22

will i'm gonna be honest wit you guys here ,, so manly i did'nt like it, it lack's emotion lyrically , talking about the chorus it's sounds awful , but you can better on that guys ,

talking about shadymademe ,, to be honest wit you ,, you need to work on your delivery and also try on working on spitting words so it can rhyme actually , and alot of works on flow ,, but you got good voice so work on it buddy .. :worship:

ice killa , well i gotta say that your verse was average lyrically but you know what you had a good flow but not gd delivery so work on this , nd you got energy in your verse which is good . :y:

well this song wasn’t good neither it’s bad the beat was cool I like it :y: ,, but I know guys you can do a lot better than this ..

will I’m not trying to mean or something , it’s jus cuz on this type of shit you need a real feeed you dont need compliments , I can jus say that it’s was good and dope nd these staff, but I don’t think that will help you guys ..
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Solace » Jan 3rd, '09, 18:45

z_em wrote:will i'm gonna be honest wit you guys here ,, so manly i did'nt like it, it lack's emotion lyrically , talking about the chorus it's sounds awful , but you can better on that guys ,

talking about shadymademe ,, to be honest wit you ,, you need to work on your delivery and also try on working on spitting words so it can rhyme actually , and alot of works on flow ,, but you got good voice so work on it buddy .. :worship:

ice killa , well i gotta say that your verse was average lyrically but you know what you had a good flow but not gd delivery so work on this , nd you got energy in your verse which is good . :y:

well this song wasn’t good neither it’s bad the beat was cool I like it :y: ,, but I know guys you can do a lot better than this ..

will I’m not trying to mean or something , it’s jus cuz on this type of shit you need a real feeed you dont need compliments , I can jus say that it’s was good and dope nd these staff, but I don’t think that will help you guys ..
:wave:

Thanks man, glad you could actually be honest :) As ive said before im trying to fix my delivery and flow. Hopefully youll see huge improvement next time ;)
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Requiem » Jan 3rd, '09, 19:34

^thx for the feed. i'm glad we're getting alot of good honest feed on this track. we will both improve lyrically/delivery wise.
@z_em, thx man. i'll definitely work on that delivery :8)
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Re: Epiphany - Burn You Down (Feat. Ice Killa)

Postby Robbie G » Jan 4th, '09, 00:48

Shady: You NEED more emotion and energy in it. For your next track get angry and yell your verse just to see how it comes out. That should put you in the right direction lol. Lyrics were fine.

Ice: Your verse had good flow,. Altogether the verse wasn't amazing but I thought it was pretty good. :y:

The chorus was neat wit you guys trading off. It sounded a little weird in parts but I liked it.

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