A Story.

[MC Anonymous]

http://www.zshare.net/audio/57542774ae85ee6b/ <-- song

Lyrics:

Sometimes I just feel like life isnt right
spittin' fright, I'm hittin this book with might
shit.... my sight just isn't what it used to be
I'm an abused seed, this life is using me
refusing these meds, I can live on my own
can pawns have a home? am I just a clone
must a zone be painted with the bloodshed
yet this blood led inside my own head
my thoughts are complex, It's a brain flex
and insane hex is nothing more then it's reflex
she said, ''death lives inside the living''
if that's the case, then why am I still dreaming
as it seems, death's blood is on my shadow
as it follows, hours pass, it's bigger to swallow
with triggers I wallow, tears slip down and shatter
I drown in laughter, understanding is splattered
bastards, I look in the universe, does it really ''matter''
I'm merely a rapper, dieing before or after
Insomia, when I close my eyes I see myself
withered organs, it's so obscene to health
lifetime intertwined in the light of your eyes
if you fight disguised, you will die inside
I write this rhyme, to let all of you know,
You're not alone, this is how it's shown
ribcage is twisted bones, torment and agony
practicly cried, yet never touched a bag of weed
recovery, three months in a mental institution
where I did spit pollution, no restitution
the hallways marked by misunderstanding
pissed cause I'm handing, it's just not landing
until I lost control, rushed towards a kid
when to split his face, last second I hid
in a corner, blacked out, woke up restrained
majority of the time, it was all the same
even when I took a shower, they'd walk in
stalkin', exposed when another man saw me jerkin
it's absurd when my pants had to have no metal
say one thing wrong, get put in a kennel
every day was the same, stupid meetings
stupid greetings, yet they weren't even seeing
the life they were taking, my words are breaking
verbs are shaking, paragraphs cry, mistaking
the anguish for pain, ninety days I will never see
forever greed took control, now I silently bleed
never again, my life is different in this moment
spitting poems and music, I already own it
the spirit inside, hear it and ride, don't fear it this time
I'm near it with rhyme, put these sheer hits aside

[MC Anonymous]

so it's finally out -_-

damn have you been in a mental hostipal also

lyrics were dope, duhh lol

only problem I could hear was your voice, and by that I mean you need more control of it. The flow didn't impress me much either so keep working on that

I may sound harsh, but it was a good song

Thanks for the feed bro, and yes unfortunatly I have...

[Xray]

You stressed your words big time man, its the beats fault though, I don't think you wrote to the beat, sounds like its a story you wrote and than started looking for a beat to spit it on. But damn the beat is way to slow for you, that's why you stretched your words. Lyrics were good as usual, but the flow was all over the place, and the delivery wasn't good, you struggled big time on it. Hopefully with more normal paced beats, and more laid back delivery you should get better. Good luck on your next track man.

[DelinQuent]

if you fight disguised, you will die inside SICK FUCKING LINE. honestly, thats some deep shit

ok now for the rest, i felt like the angry delivery didnt work for the most part, it worked in some spots like "even when I took a shower, they'd walk in" that shit was dope too. but i felt if your voice was more mellow then got angry for some spots it would have been MUCH better.

flow came off in some spots but was good for the most part. i didnt mind the word stretching as other did. i actually kinda liked hearing this slower flow from you.

overall, my best advice is to chill out with the screaming and show your real voice

and about the mental institution, im glad to see you're doing okay now, im assuming you're doing better. writing poetry and rap is better therapy than any institution or therapist can give you. so even if you quit rap, keep writing and shit cause it truly does help deal with emotions.

EDIT-Could you possibly PM me with a link to this beat? thanks.