The 10 Best Eminem Celebrity Disses

[lil_bayly]

http://www.complexmag.ca/music/2013/09/ ... ium=social



Summer is over. All but officially. But we're looking forward to fall for lots of reasons. One of them, the return of Eminem! Mostly because his latest single, "Berzerk," proves that Shady's back (tell a friend.) He's blonde again, and reenergized, and having fun, up to his old antics—making naughty jokes at the expense of famous pop culture figures. "All I know is I fell asleep and woke up in that Monte Carlo," he rhymes. "With the ugly Kardashian/Lamar, oh sorry, yo/We done both set the bar low."

It's bars like these that have helped define Eminem's career since he stopped rapping like AZ and released The Slim Shady LP. He ushered in a big change in rap. While pop culture has always been a huge part of American life, and as television, and then the Internet, brought our favorite (and least favorite) celebrities into our daily collective consciousness more and more ubiquitously, rap lyrics didn't reflect this to the extent that do now until Eminem started writing his rhymes like they were rippsed from the tabloids.

His debut introduced this stylistic tic to the masses. And even as Em has proved he belongs in any room full of superstars, that's never stopped him from lobbing spitballs from the back. He's poked made fun at everyone, from Bill Clinton to Pamela Anderson, George Bush to Jessica Simpson. Although the pool to choose from in olympic-size, we picked The 10 Best Eminem Celebrity Disses.

10. "Cause if I ever stuck it to any singer in showbiz/It'd be Jennifer Lopez, and Puffy you know this!/I'm sorry Puff, but I don't give a fuck if this chick was my own mother/I still fuck her with no rubber and cum inside her/And have a son and a new brother at the same time/And just say that it ain't mine."
Song: Eminem "I'm Back" (2000)
Album: The Marshall Mathers LP
Label: Aftermath/Interscope/Shady

You could argue that this isn't necessarily a diss. It might even be a (crude) compliment. Regardless, it's straight rude to rap about having sex with another dude's girl in such graphic detail, even if every guy has had a similar fantasy.

9. "And Moby? You can get stomped by Obie/You thirty-six year old baldheaded fag, blow me/You don't know me, you're too old, let go/It's over, nobody listens to techno."
Song: Eminem "Without Me" (2002)
Album: The Eminem Show
Label: Aftermath/Interscope/Shady

This scathing set of bars was in response to Moby calling Eminem a "misogynist, a homophobe, a racist, and an anti-Semite." Calling someone a fag doesn't exactly do much to dispute accusations of homophobia, but nobody can say hip-hop was progressive in the early 2000s.

8. "I'm anti-Backstreet and Ricky Martin/With instincts to kill N'Sync, don't get me started/These fucking brats can't sing and Britney's garbage"
Song: Eminem "Marshall Mathers" (2000)
Album: The Marshall Mathers LP
Label: Aftermath/Interscope/Shady

Eminem has made his feelings about pop stars well known throughout his career. This is one of his most impressive disses because of how jam packed it is. In just three bars Em manages to take down four acts. Ruthless.


7. "Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door/And started whippin' her ass worse than before/They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture."
Song: Eminem "The Real Slim Shady" (2000)
Album: The Marshall Mathers LP
Label: Aftermath/Interscope/Shady

He didn't say what we think he did, did he? Yes, Eminem went there and made fun of the abuse Pamela Anderson suffered at the hands of Tommy Lee. The Mötley Crüe drummer served four months in prison for kicking Anderson. Clearly, there are few lines Eminem won't cross.

6. "That would mean I lie and get fucked more than the President does/Hilary Clinton tried to slap me and call me a pervert/I ripped her fucking tonsils out and fed her sherbet (bitch!)"
Song: Eminem "Role Model" (1999)
Album: The Slim Shady LP
Label: Aftermath/Interscope/Web

Despite Eminem's apparent disdain for Hillary Clinton, she could be an ally. In an interview with CBS in 2010, the potential 2016 candidate said, "Hip-hop is America." This was after the US State Department sent a rap group named Chen Lo and The Liberation Family to Syria in a diplomacy effort. We doubt Em will be next, but he's got to appreciate Clinton's nod to the genre.

5. "Stuck a pin in Jessica's head and walked away/And as she flew around the room like a balloon/I grabbed the last can of chicken tuna out the trash can."
Song: Eminem "Rain Man" (2004)
Album: Encore
Label: Shady/Aftermath/Interscope

Tucked away on an album cut on his less popular albums, this isn't one of Eminem's most well known disses. But don't let its relative obscurity fool you. It's one of Em's best because he paints the picture of Jessica Simpson as an airhead and uses canned tuna as more of an afterthought than the focus. Most rappers would resort to something lazier like "You're dumber than Jessica Simpson eating canned tuna" but no, not Marshall

4. "Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs/So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst/And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first/Little bitch, put me on blast on MTV/"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!"/I should download her audio on MP3/And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD."
Song: Eminem "The Real Slim Shady" (2000)
Album: The Marshall Mathers LP
Label: Aftermath/Interscope/Shady

Let's start with some VMA history. Back in 2000 Fred Durst performed "Livin' It Up" with Christina Aguilera in a move that the rest of Limp Bizkit didn't approve of. Later on Durst would claim he'd done it for the nookie. Meanwhile, Carson Daly was rumored to have been dating Aguilera, hence his inclusion.

Not surprisingly, Christina objected to Eminem's lyric and said, "He got no nookie. That did not happen, OK? I just want to clear the table right there, and the thing with Carson [Daly] too. Eminem's whole song did not happen, OK? It just didn't, but it's some really crazy stuff that people want to insinuate and people want to say, and it is hurtful." Okay fine, just because we enjoy when Em makes fun of people that doesn't mean he hasn't hurt some feelings over the years. But hey, it's all in good fun.

3. "You made to my house when you was Wild'n Out before Nick/When you was on my dick and give you something to smile about."
Song: Eminem "The Warning" (2009)
Album: N/A
Label: Shady/Aftermath/Interscope

"The Warning" is just one of the many chapters in the long running feud between Eminem and Mariah Carey. It all began in 2001 when the two performers allegedly dated. A year later Em called her out on "Superman" by rapping, "What you trying be? My new wife?/What, you Mariah? Fly through twice." While Em confirmed their relationship in an interview with Rolling Stone, but Carey denied it in her own interview with Larry King.

The two would go at each other publicly for years, but it was 2009's "Bagpipes From Baghdad" that turned things up a notch. Eminem's shots at Mariah and her husband Nick Cannon prompted two responses—a blog post from Cannon and the song "Obsessed" from Carey. Although she denied any beef, Mariah was clearly channeling Eminem when she dressed as a hoodied stocker in the subsequent video. She probably regretted the move when Eminem dedicated all of "The Warning" to ethering her.

2. After I gave you props in that song, you on national TV/Talkin' 'bout Everlast is gonna whip my ass when he sees me?/Come on dawg, you was supposed to be on that song/Talkin' bout how bad you hate him, now you all on his thong?/What's wrong? You scared, and Fred, you said you was dissin' him too/I should have knew better than to listen to you."
Song: D12 "Girls" (2001)
Album: Devil's Night
Label: Shady/Interscope

Limp Bizkit picked the wrong side when Eminem dissed Everlast. Lethal, the band's DJ, ignored Em giving Limp Bizkit daps and said Everlast would kick his ass. This obviously didn't faze Em. It only provoked him. Slim Shady went in solo on the track from the first D12 album and tore apart Limp Bizkit. Some lines are harsher, but this string relies on #factsonly.

1. "Mosh pits outside the Oval Office, someone's trying/To tell us something maybe this is God just/Saying we're responsible, for this monster/This coward that we have empowered, this is Bin Laden/Look at his head nodding-how could, we allow/Something like this without, pumping our fist now."
Song: Eminem "Mosh" (2004)
Album: Encore
Label: Shady/Aftermath/Interscope

George W. Bush was the second president to get the Slim Shady treatment. Unlike the lighthearted jabs at Clinton's affair, Eminem's comments on the Iraq war were knockouts. He wasn't satisfied with saying "Fuck Bush." Em goes all in, comparing the president to Osama Bin Laden and suggesting he strap up and fight his war marked with "blood for oil." How Dubya picked Kanye West's infamous one-liner instead of "Mosh" as the worst moment of his presidency is beyond us.

[EllenPage-Mathers]

I hate these top 10 lists, people should make their own mind up IMO.

[EllenPage-Mathers]

Lists are fun, even if they're inaccurate.

The Warning is #1 obviously. For the better part of a decade, people doubted Marshall's claims that he ever had a relationship with Mariah Carey. After Bagpipes came out, Mariah and Nick "-elodeon" Cannon were dumb enough to diss Eminem and try to paint him as a crazy stalker. Then Em drops the fucking Warning with Mariah's vocals in the third verse and proves he was telling the truth all along. It's absolute venom, way more personal and brutal than any of his other disses. And I fucking love it.

*ahem* Kim. *ahem*

Unless that isn't a diss.

[EllenPage-Mathers]

I don't consider Kim a diss, given that Kim was only known to the public as Eminem's wife. She didn't exactly have a career to be ruined.

Even then, The Sauce sounds a whole lot angrier, especially when he says:
You don't know me or my motherfucking mother, you motherfucking punk!

[UofLCard]

I wouldn't call Mosh a 'diss'.

[Drax207]

The Warning is one of his best song ever and my favorite diss. It's just perfect. No other words can describe the quality of this diss. And like Horsebot3K said, the last part of the song is brilliant and is the reason why I think it's one of the best diss ever made. Guess it's useless to explain why ... Killin' Mariah with her own words. Genius. Fucking genius. Em simply unleashed everything he has to make her lose her credibility once and for all.
And that flow, that delivery, that outstanding rhyme scheme, and Dre killed it with that beat.

Best celebrity diss ever.

[Shade135]

Favourite diss is The Sauce for a personal beef. Not sure if anger is the right word, but his anger and drive is incredible in that song.

Favourite diss is Mosh for a political song. That shit is no holds barred. Fucking fire.

Can't pick a "best".

[Monster]

'Summer is Over' what are they talking about its 100 degrees where I'm at

[ladelsofgravy]

"so you could suck my dick with amy winehouses teeth" lol

[unbound88]

'Summer is Over' what are they talking about its 100 degrees where I'm at

U in SoCal?

edit: Clearly "The Warning" is the best celebrity diss he did.

[zebreniuc]

what's this bitch retarded? give me back my sixteen dolars!

[tommygun999]

dont get why em mentions kim kardashian so much in his songs kim kardashian

[Emadyville]

decent/fun list.

he needs to start actually dissing rappers, i miss the drama of the old days

[Kill You]

Honestly, the Lamar O. line really is one of his best disses. I played Berzerk for some friends the other day and when they heard that line they went "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" lol. That line will be remembered, I think.

[EllenPage-Mathers]

Honestly, the Lamar O. line really is one of his best disses. I played Berzerk for some friends the other day and when they heard that line they went "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" lol. That line will be remembered, I think.

He overdoes the Kadashians tbh. Shoudl just diss Kanye, even though he never disses anyone who is huge ( apart form a small diss at MJ.)