Get Lifted.

[Ticalrecords]

I wrote this to D12's Pistol Pistol. its only the first verse, i need to know if im on the right track or if i need to scrap this shit and redo it cuz i want to do the beat justice. feedback is much appreciated..

I got a problem like a prescription bottle that drains too fast away to fill/
I smoke a blunt then the munchies finds me eating my weight in pills/
getting high with downers I know sounds like a conflicting plan/
trust me, I write in my rhyme book as much as I do on that stolen prescription pad/
so I know what im doing, nose swollen and oozing,
and if im nuts then wut do I tell my doctor if these bolts need some screwing?/
im strung out like a tightrope, as tight as eyes closed, in fright no, way ill die with mine closed/ angel dust rap, u bite it, I snort it/
u say its poppin, but that’s only after I’ve corked it/
im ur favorite rapper’s exorcist,
and even before damian was born, I was the one who performed that poor bastard’s abortion/
god damn!! now aint that a female dog/
even before any of you burn in hell's fire ima cremate yall/
so thank me, and my love of drugs/ for the safety u feel when fuckin up/
cuz if u did it, iv done it multiple times and managed to circumvent, death/
im still alive – so the damage done aint shit but permanent... yet/

the highlighted lines are the ones im thinking about taking out.
btw im worried about weak/stupid lines so tear my shit apart yk

[gutawafang]

It fits the beat almost perfectly. Nice one man.

im ur favorite rapper’s exorcist,
and even before damian was born, I was the one who performed that poor bastard’s abortion/

[Ticalrecords]

thanks guys for the feedback. i plan on dropping more, more often

[Yah-hah]

eah man the line that guta said was dope. Agree with col just touch up some words and you'll be straight