by Brownwall » Nov 26th, '10, 21:52
That was a really great song. Beat was nice (where'd you get it?), lyrics and rapping were on point, jus a few apparent slip ups in the second verse, but not anything significant. Track is also well-mixed, sounds good, and well blended. I also liked the concept.
First verse was probably better overall, consistently dope delivery and flow, but one thing that was enjoyable about the second verse was the change-ups in tone, delivery, flow, etc., kept things fresh. So yea, you could both take something from each other.
I really liked the sort of bridge thing at the end, that sounded nice.
For improvement, and this is just nitpicking, things I'm still working on myself, 'cause overall the track is really sick, but I guess you could've put more into the editing of the chorus, make it sound more different than the verses, added more to it (overdubs, ad-libs, effects). Also, you could continue to work on mixing the vocals, I would probably bring down the volume on the vocals a bit. And finally, maybe rap on more professional beats to give your tracks a bigger sound if you're looking for that.
But anyways, like I said before, dope ass track, keep it up. Check out my group's stuff if you find time.
http://www.youtube.com/user/TriangleOffenseMusic"That's why we seize the moment try to freeze it and own it, squeeze it and
hold it/Cause we consider these minutes golden/And maybe they'll admit it when we're gone/Just let our spirits live on, through our lyrics that you hear in our songs..."