Insidious

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 03:55

Insidious is the scariest movie of all time. Look it up and go watch it. If you're into scary movies you're gonna love this. Even the most experienced of scary movie enthusiasts will SHIT their fucking pants. If you're a serial killer that has seen guts, blood and dead carcasses you will SHIT your pants. If you're a cannibal you will SHIT your pants.

I'm not gonna spoil it but the movie has children, demons, possessions and supernatural ish involved. WATCH THIS SHIT. If you're not good with scary movies don't watch it unless you want to die of a heart attack.

*DISCLAIMER*: Fuck the Entertainment section, I'm too cool for that.

EDIT: Since dead prez is gay, he wants me to review this movie. I won't make it long but here it goes...

The movie is about this family that moves into this house and strange things start happening (surprise, surprise). The doors open by themselves and it's just strange. One day one of the little kids (Dolton) goes to the creepy-ass attic, climbs a ladder and tries to turn the light on. He falls off and hits his head. His parents come up, blah blah "are you okay". He goes to bed and the next day he doesn't wake up. Doctor tell the parents that he's in a coma but he has no brain damage and that they have never seen anything like this before. Months pass, he's in a coma. One day the transmitter that's at the other younger baby's room start picking up a demonish sounding voice. Mom hears it and she goes to the room and the scariest fucking face shows itself outside the window. Everyone panics, the alarm goes off, dad gets his crowbar and doesn't find the scary dude. Days pass they still live there. They're scared shitless then they move out to the Dad's mom's house. They scary dude appears, this time dancing to Spongebob music. Family calls this bad-ass old lady that specializes in this shit. She tells the family that the house isn't haunted.... That's all I'm gonna review because honestly, I don't want to ruin the experience of anyone who actually wants to watch it. After that it's a big mindfuck.

GO WATCH IT.

by **dead prez** » Apr 17th, '11, 04:07

Translation:

I can't review for shit, so I'm going to make some half ass excuse like I don't want to spoil the movie for you guys, so just watch it yourself.

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 04:09

Do you want me to review the movie for you, asshole?

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 04:29

Menzo wrote:Word, I heard people had to leave the theaters and shit cuz it was too scary for them to handle. I'm thinking of seeing it after my exams are over.

I'll bring a bucket for shitting too.

And that's exactly what happened. I counted 4 instances in which people ran out.... AT THE BEGINNING. I swear to you, even the beginning credits of the movie are scary and creepy.

Come with a bunch of friends and a girl you like. Then you have an excuse to touch her up :shifty:

by **Satire** » Apr 17th, '11, 04:34

Master Chief wrote:
Menzo wrote:Word, I heard people had to leave the theaters and shit cuz it was too scary for them to handle. I'm thinking of seeing it after my exams are over.

I'll bring a bucket for shitting too.

And that's exactly what happened. I counted 4 instances in which people ran out.... AT THE BEGINNING. I swear to you, even the beginning credits of the movie are scary and creepy.

Come with a bunch of friends and a girl you like. Then you have an excuse to touch her up :shifty:

Too bad you didn't do this. You tried to pull that arm around her head bullshit and until she looked at you with disdain and politely asked you if you could not do that, and then awkwardly got up to switch seats with her guy friend nearby. :coffee:

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 04:36

I never claimed to have done that. I didn't even sit next to the only female who came with us.

Anyways, I'll write a review once I get me some Vanilla Coke and once I can finally see clearly.

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 05:01

Menzo wrote:
Master Chief wrote:And that's exactly what happened. I counted 4 instances in which people ran out.... AT THE BEGINNING. I swear to you, even the beginning credits of the movie are scary and creepy.

Come with a bunch of friends and a girl you like. Then you have an excuse to touch her up

Spend 11 bucks to touch up a girl? Fuck that shit, I can raid my dad's toolbox in the basement for some duct tape and feel the bitch up for free.

But otherwise, word.

Other fellas aren't that lucky, you know? :angry:

Updated the OP btw.

by **dead prez** » Apr 17th, '11, 05:59

tl;dr

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 06:13

dead prez wrote:tl;dr

GO. DIE.

That's not even long, you simple-minded fool.

by **Block** » Apr 17th, '11, 06:19

I wish I were genuinely scared by this type of thing. I'm not trying to sound like a 'badass' or anything, but I LOVE this type of shit in real life. I mean, like, out of the movies.. Ghosts and hauntings and shit. It doesn't scare me. I wish it did. My cousin and her family are involved in 'ghost hunting' (it's actually legit) and they have all those types of meters and readers and shit you see on TV. They're affiliated with that TAPS team from the TV series. (the ones that are plumbers, if anyone watches that shit)..

But yeah, I love these types of movies and hearing the actual real encounters of these types of things.

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 06:25

^ That's crazy, dude. Personally, that shit scares the balls out of me. One of my biggest fears. But, this movie is more than that. I only reviewed like half of the movie in this. It gets more complex and terrifying towards the end. (Even though, the movie as a whole is a pain for the heart).

by **VenomBlackViper** » Apr 17th, '11, 07:42

If this movie isn't at least as good as a snuff film I will be very disappoint. Luring me in with hopes of watching some sick shit & making me sit through 2 hours of fucking rainbows & unicorns. However I can't ignore the hype so i'm gonna watch this tomorrow.

by **Master Chief** » Apr 17th, '11, 07:47

VenomBlackViper wrote:If this movie isn't at least as good as a snuff film I will be very disappoint. Luring me in with hopes of watching some sick shit & making me sit through 2 hours of fucking rainbows & unicorns. However I can't ignore the hype so i'm gonna watch this tomorrow.

It isn't a gore movie so don't go in expecting to see blood and guts. Expect to stay awake the whole night afterwards like I am right now.

It's a very Diabolic movie :shifty:

by **_Steven_** » Apr 18th, '11, 01:19

This movie is probably the most hyped thing I've ever heard of :unsure:

I mean there were some good jumpy parts in the beginning and Darth Maul was scary for a few seconds but all in all this movie was pretty average. The little boy and twins were not scary at all.

Actually decent parts:
Face in the crib veil
Baby monitor scream thing
Darth Maul appearing behind chick's head

by **Master Chief** » Apr 18th, '11, 02:36

Miller1121 wrote:You should review more movies. I lol'd a few times. I like your word choice.

I'm a funny guy :flutter:

Who's actually thinking of watching this? Or who watched it already?

@Steven, you must have no heart or soul. Your sig alone is proof. Honestly, it's not hyped up maybe for you because you have no soul but I saw about 7 different groups of people run out of the movies the entire time I was there. It's extremely scary for most of us WITH SOULS :angry:

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