delete

by **Atone** » Sep 24th, '11, 10:12

this is no longer available

by **mdemaz** » Sep 24th, '11, 10:28

Based diss man, beat was sorta meh....
Who's that rapping at the start?
Damn, your voice is too loud and needs more treble dude..Make it mono man and not stereo, haha..
Try to stay on beat too...

Eh, good try, considering what gear you have, this is really good.

by **Atone** » Sep 24th, '11, 10:37

not much of a diss really just basically a warning, since the girl i'm friends with is actually friends with both the ppl i'm talkin about in the song, i'm sure she can get the message to them,

and this is actually not the final version, i'm re-recordin different verses for the album version,

i can't remember who that is at the beginning, i somehow gained access to my old e-mail account and this guy i was gonna work with on a song months ago sent me that, if i find out who it is i'll let you know,

by **mdemaz** » Sep 24th, '11, 10:54

Atone The Underdog wrote:not much of a diss really just basically a warning, since the girl i'm friends with is actually friends with both the ppl i'm talkin about in the song, i'm sure she can get the message to them,

and this is actually not the final version, i'm re-recordin different verses for the album version,

i can't remember who that is at the beginning, i somehow gained access to my old e-mail account and this guy i was gonna work with on a song months ago sent me that, if i find out who it is i'll let you know,

Interesting..You should get at him again because he's got a cool voice.

by **Eedee** » Sep 25th, '11, 05:35

The beat was okay, nothing spectacular. Your vocals need serious mastering, dude. Audacity is good for that. Compressor is a nice tool :happy:

You're way off beat most of the time, and it kinda detracts from the message of the song. You need better flow and delivery, but that was probably just the quality of the vocals which did that. The lyrics were okay, you need better structure. At one point you said "... I could really embarrass you, If I expose the truth, there's so much more to this" looks good on paper depending on the previous and following lines, but you botched that opportunity up. You do, though, on the following bar end with "this" to sort of make up for the rhyme, but it would sound 200x better if you added a few more internal rhymes for "this".

Overall, this needs work, but the message is there for the people who this was made for, so more power to ya!

Feed me back please? Me and mdemaz made this earlier this week! :smoking: