Newer Writing Experiment #5

[JamaicanPattlez]

My skills are so dope, man it's quite the equilibrium,
I'm still with no soap, damn this dyke, she better gimme some,
I slit a whore's throat and now I might see the feeling of,
Why shit's so provoked, the land's a zebra's living room,
Lyrically gifted, spiritually lifted, by the time you swing by I'm eerily ballistic,
Tyranny missed it, the weary now fixed this, I start lines of crimes like a villainy mystic,
I'm a fucked up individual and kids are spitting out soliloquies,
They'll get bucked with my residuals, shit I'm feeling no humility,
I can make a drunk text twist into some fun sex,
Yet that would take my Hun vexed and shift into a dumb ex,
You're a bigger contradiction than a loner with Schizophrenia,
Who'd figure you had a dick son, taste the boner you get plenty of,
Glamorous females that can be so hazardous,
Cantankerous seen there, and can cling like Canibus,
Understandably it's foolish, and I smell their boobs like tulips,
Hundred Stanleys now are boorish cause I pelt the view like tourists.

viewtopic.php?f=24&t=133697

[JamaicanPattlez]

Thank you, bruh. Yeah, see the babbling and the big words thing always gets me, any tips?

[JamaicanPattlez]

Thank you, bruh. Yeah, see the babbling and the big words thing always gets me, any tips?

Ask Menzo, he's the king of using big vocab in awesome ways.

Patiently waiting!


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[JamaicanPattlez]

He's viewing this thread

[JamaicanPattlez]

Definitely understood. Yeah, the only shit I'll carry to audio are the attained skills and probably rehashed lines from pieces. I get it though. Thanks!

[JamaicanPattlez]

:worship: Definitely understood. Yeah, the only shit I'll carry to audio are the attained skills and probably rehashed lines from pieces. I get it though. Thanks!

You got it, son

I think the same way too.

Nice! I'm looking to get to a point where my lyrics are polished enough to seriously survive in the Underground.

[JamaicanPattlez]

Thanks, bruh.

[Sam.]

What about "Newer Writing Style Experiment #3" ???

Dope Rhymes was the 1st thing that came into my mind when I read this. It was like Tech Nina spraying words with a dope flow, it's must be obvious to you by the above statement that I used Tech's technique to flow for this.

I used to people advice people who used big words that use such words that rhyme with it in the following bars, just to counter balance the flow. I think you used the concept of broken Multi, I remember Spyder talking about it, I'm not sure. Anyway you did everything right, so the vocab wasn't the problem, in fact was the standout of your verse.

It's a good piece bro, you definitely killing it.

[JamaicanPattlez]

What about "Newer Writing Style Experiment #3" ???

Dope Rhymes was the 1st thing that came into my mind when I read this. It was like Tech Nina spraying words with a dope flow, it's must be obvious to you by the above statement that I used Tech's technique to flow for this.

I used to people advice people who used big words that use such words that rhyme with it in the following bars, just to counter balance the flow. I think you used the concept of broken Multi, I remember Spyder talking about it, I'm not sure. Anyway you did everything right, so the vocab wasn't the problem, in fact was the standout of your verse.

It's a good piece bro, you definitely killing it.

Thanks my dude. I think I may have lol, explain. Cause I probably have it in my head as something different.

[Sam.]

See the "Writers Vault" thread, Newer Writing Style Experiment #3" is missing.

[JamaicanPattlez]

See the "Writers Vault" thread, Newer Writing Style Experiment #3" is missing.

I mean the broken Multis, but Hmm... I thought I wrote #3. Either I never wrote that yet, or I'll have to go search for it.

[SG.]

I don't see the huge vocab as a problem, as long as you can give the reader a general sense of what it means. Aside from that, this is uncriticisable. I like how you're experimenting now. It allows you to find a style that suits you best.

Feed back? viewtopic.php?f=24&t=133685

[JamaicanPattlez]

I don't see the huge vocab as a problem, as long as you can give the reader a general sense of what it means. Aside from that, this is uncriticisable. I like how you're experimenting now. It allows you to find a style that suits you best.

Feed back? viewtopic.php?f=24&t=133685

Thanks man!