Snug Jackets

[Kill You]

This morning, I woke up in a cold sweat
From having nightmares about all the women I haven't fucked yet
I have too much stress, it sucks and it's in excess
I'm in a sticky situation 'cause I left myself a hot mess
So be cautious or else I might come up on you like the Lochness
And lock this dick around your throat while we swap texts
The swamp is where I rest all the dead bodies before I digest
How about some white meat, I'll start at the breast then fuck with your sinuses
Make my way through the intestines, heart, then I cut inside her chest
I'm doing everything backwards, like returning a signed check
I be burning through sex like you shoot at a vest
Keep going until I finally hit the head then I scoot into bed
Now I'm not even bothered by her death, how sick can a person be?
I'll steal your purse indeed, and won't even steal any money, just your keys
Go to your house, break in
Start taking random shit like plates and break them
Then I go on to light that bitch on fire
I switch chicks when I desire and they don't even mind it
As long as they get a piece of that pie, AKA my dick
And when I'm done hitting, I quit that shit literally
I'm finished, Dee, so sorry that I left you unattended but see
All I really wanted was some pussy and some ecstasy
So before you have sex with me, so Becca understand this
Don't try too hard because I give out secondhand kisses
And I'm usually not one to cast any blame
But that's not the case here, I got played like a game and put on blast by a dame
So now my brain is scattered, my mind reveals a broken frame
You should be so ashamed that you can make a nice guy like me go numb like Novacane
Now I got hoes in the back snorting coke
Forking blokes while I'm in the studio recording vocs
You can come back stage, just bring some smoke
And now I'm passed out from being so high
How could I have ignored all the signs?
I never thought that I could be a drug addict, more jacked up than a bugged rabbit
Snug jackets for the mentally impaired, what a habit

I really like this one, especially the last two bars.

viewtopic.php?f=24&t=153279&p=2106648#p2106648

[EmTV]

I actually preed a bit.

I liked it

[Spyder]

pm me a link of feed and ill re-open this

[Spyder]

ok ill let this slide, but that link of feed literally says

good job, keep it up
we need a little more feed than that...

[Kill You]

Without a beat, it felt aimless and had no flow. The lines were really long and it felt unnatural to me. The rhymes were there, but I would've took more time with it and worded it better.

It's good for a beginner.

I think I tend to put lines in just to keep rhyming and it seems that way. There are a few standout lines I feel like though. The way I rap it out loud, the flow makes more sense. I agree that I need to start wording things better, quite often I'll write something then later on I'll think of something that would have sounded way better.

I think my Darth Vader rap is a little tighter than this. I kinda took my time on that one.

[Just Silver]

really really liked this the flow was nice *when it worked for me* and i love how the imagery played in my head again idk if it the avy but reminds me of an OF flow

very surprising great piece wasnt sure what to think at first with the title lol