Favorite Alcohol/Drugs

[SliK]

I would love to try MDMA, especially now that I have more of an understanding of how it works.

[Just Silver]

i thought u already took it lol

[SliK]

Nah I never have. I've only ever done (lots of) weed, and shrooms a couple of times.

[Just Silver]

i still wanna do shrooms lol and summer is almst over so that means waiting another year

[SliK]

I highly recommend them, despite what AI says.

[Just Silver]

i didnt knowhe was against them either lol

[SliK]

I think he much prefers LSD.

[AbramIsaac]

Well, I'm not the biggest fan of mushrooms, this is true. The main thing I disagree with people about them is the idea that they are a good psychedelic to start out on. personally, I found them to be a strange and somewhat harsh drug to work with the first time. For beginners, I do feel that a modest dose of LSD would be more manageable.

That said, I did enjoy the visuals of mushrooms over LSD. I don't really care for either though, as my personal preference is Mescaline. Phenylamine drugs seem to just be more gentle psychedelics than tryptamines. All true psychedelics are worth a try though.

[Trimss]

Well, I'm not the biggest fan of mushrooms, this is true. The main thing I disagree with people about them is the idea that they are a good psychedelic to start out on. personally, I found them to be a strange and somewhat harsh drug to work with the first time. For beginners, I do feel that a modest dose of LSD would be more manageable.

That said, I did enjoy the visuals of mushrooms over LSD. I don't really care for either though, as my personal preference is Mescaline. Phenylamine drugs seem to just be more gentle psychedelics than tryptamines. All true psychedelics are worth a try though.

Yo I missed your posts.

[Elision]

I do not recommend mushrooms as a first time psychedelic. If you do, please take a tiny tiny dose. I may have already mentioned it somewhere earlier in the thread, but I fucked myself up for months and ended up having be medicated for a while due to 1 psilocin experience. psilocin is the DMT extract of psilocybin mushrooms. if anyone cares i'll tell the full story, but to cut it short I ended up on the floor of my bathroom accepting my own death. after what seemed like an eternity in absolute hell i found myself trying to pull myself together in my bathroom, this was after walking around the block a few times and doing whatever else I could to stop feeling like I was slipping out of existence. I felt like I was generating this entire experience and I was about to zap my way out of it. Which sounds ridiculous until you're on them, abram can back me up there. Anyway, at some point I found myself there looking in the mirror and everything started spinning out. It was like the panic and anxiety had become too much for my body to handle. I fell to the floor, the music I had playing from the other room had turned into a loud ringing sound and I slowly blacked out.

And mushroom trip doesn't just fade off, there's no real "okay i'm not high any more". it becomes a part of you. it's a beautiful thing, but it can easily become a terrible and scary thing if you get caught in a bad loop. One of the first things mushrooms do when you ingest them is unplug your perception of time. A minute will seem like an hour and vise versa, so there's no telling yourself "okay this will go away soon i just gotta ride it out".



TL;DR: Please do not take mushrooms as your first psychedelic. And if you do, take less than a gram. They are a serious tryptamine and can seriously fuck your world upside down for a long time.

[Just Silver]

id like to know more about the mushroom experience

[SliK]

I took a gram and a half first time dose an had a ball.

[Just Silver]

sounds good to me lol i wish it was available throughout the year not just summer

[Elision]

id like to know more about the mushroom experience

Well I thought I was a badass and could handle anything, because nothing had been too much for me to handle up to this point.

So my guy texts me and says his brother (the chemist) had extracted this stuff called 'psilocin'. He told me that he popped 2 of them and the fuckin sky turned green followed be a full on OBE. He didn't go into any more detail than that, but I was already interested. I asked him what it was and he went on to explain that it's the DMT extract of psilocybin mushrooms. Creating 4-ho-DMT. $10 a pop so I bought 5 and headed home. He had also given me the rest of the booster he had, called Syrian Rue. It's an MAOI inhibitor. Makes the trip considerably more intense.

So skip ahead to that night, it's about 12:00. Just got home from dropping my girlfriend off at her friends house. Figured the time was right so I mixed 3 grams of the rue with orange juice, and popped the psilocin. The psilocin was just a tiny dark brown dab inside a clear capsule, and I was just taking one, so I figured the booster would be necessary for me to trip as hard as I wanted. Bad idea.

I started listening to some music and rolling a couple blunts, and 30 minutes in I still felt nothing. So I figured I'd go for a walk around the block, maybe get it pumping through my system or whatever. I get back inside at 12:50, and I was still feeling nothing. At that point I just said fuck it and decided to smoke one of my blunts. And the exact moment moment I sat down here at my chair, it hit me. The closest thing I can relate this part to is the the comeup of nitrous oxide. You may have had it at the dentist or during surgery at some point in your life. Everything got super super mellow, and I sensed all of the sound (music, computer, AC, etc.) was turned down. My muscles felt extremely relaxed and I started giggling uncontrollably. The giggles went away and I coasted like that for a little while. This was the most enjoyable part of the trip. After a bit I turned my chair 90 degrees away from my desk and my head sort of plopped down. That's when I noticed my carpet looked like crawling sand. Like quicksand moving in every direction. It startled me a bit because I'd never had visuals that clearly. Only light streaks and geometric patterns on high LSD doses.

So I regain myself, sit up, turn back to my monitors and picked up one of the blunts. And at some point between putting the blunt in my mouth and lighting it, I completely forgot what I was doing. This is when the fun stopped. One of my itunes playlists is just a bunch of songs from my childhood, from old video game soundtracks and stuff, figured it would be perfect for DMT. But one of the songs from a very sad time in my life came on, and all of those memories came through and hit me like a mac truck. I was immediately filled with a deep sense of disgust and self-loathing. It was as if whatever hopes I had left for humanity and my own personal life were sucked into black hole. That's when I reached for my phone to call my girlfriend to start apologizing for any mean thing I may have said or done, I just wanted the guilt to go away. Unfortunately the phone was fucking gibberish. Reading/writing had become hopeless. I'd love to tell you how deep I was into the trip by now but time had become a ridiculous concept. I just know I was still in my chair, and I HAD TO CHANGE THIS FUCKING SONG. But the song names were far from legible so I didn't know what to click. What I DID know, was that for whatever reason, I only had 1 shot at this. So if I clicked on another sad song (and god forbid a sadder one), I would've been fucked. So I took the leap of faith and landed on a song called 'fly' by sugar ray (fuck you, it was a catchy tune on the radio as a kid). I thought I was lucky, but all it did was make me miss my childhood. I realized that I have no contact with anyone from back then, and it made me miss my parents a lot, and I was filled with regret, wishing I could go back and say things to people, or wishing I had done a better job at remembering certain times. I should have just turned off the music at this point but the idea never occurred to me.

Eventually I found myself sitting in the corner of my bedroom, done crying and feeling sorry for myself, staring off into the wall. some sublime album was playing through at this point, and while the deep sadness was subsiding I still ultimately felt hollow and hopeless. I should also mention that from this point on I was sweating profusely. From what I understand this is normal on mushrooms. Anyway at this point I start to drift off between the wall and CEV's of what appeared to be heiroglyphs imprinted on said wall. The only one that I could distinctly make out was an eye of horus that seemed to be made of cheerio. That's when I started freaking out, I felt like I was slipping out of reality. I decided that I just needed to walk it off, so I got up, and rushed out the door, stumbling over the door sill and shit. Eventually I get outside the gates of my apartment complex and I started walking around the block again. Only this time everything felt different. It felt foreign, like I didn't belong here any more. As if I was an unwelcome guest to nature herself. And that's when all hell set in.

I started looking at 2 girls that were sitting across from me on the other side of the road, followed by the few cars passing by, and I came to this sudden realization that "holy shit. i'm making all this up" which of course sounds ridiculous when I say it now, but at the time everything was adding up perfectly. My heart started to race and my sweating increased, and I started having what I would later learn was my first panic attack. Meanwhile in my mind I thought I was dying. I thought that I figured the game out and I was now being removed from it. I was about half way around the block at this point, and I decided to needed to get back inside FAST. But I couldn't run because that would've increased my heart rate, and that could have been very bad. So I'm walking at a fast pace, seeing more and more cars, trying to block out the thought that I'm putting all of them there for my own sanity's sake.

Once I got back inside, I immediately went to my bathroom to wash my face and get out of my soaking clothes. I specifically remember walking in, looking into the mirror, realizing I looked exactly like the people that I was generating (two eyes, two ears, a nose etc.) and it all made sense to me. I was god the whole time, just here to learn myself. That's when the whole room started spinning and I fell to the floor. I'll never forget lying there flat on my stomach, and the music gradually going from simply sounding warped and mistimed, to a constant (and quite loud) ringing noise in both of my ears. I then, with things still spiraling (and me thinking this has something to do with the circle of life), accepted what was happening to me, and allowed my eyes to shut. And in the middle of all this horror and discomfort, I truly felt okay again in that short moment. It was the most peaceful I have ever felt in my entire life. The last thing I remember thinking was "this is the position they're going to find me in".

I woke up hours later lying in a small puddle of orange-juicy puke, and still felt very uncomfortable and hollow deep in my core. Although the high was gone and I was (mostly) back to my senses, I still felt extremely guilty about my life. It was only a week later that my 2nd panic attack happened one morning (first sober one), and it was triggered by thinking back on the psilocin trip, trying to figure out why it spooked me so much. I was wreck from that point on, I stayed inside on my couch for weeks, terrified to leave the house because I was convinced none of it was real. I was put on several medications including the SSRI zoloft, which scared the fuck out of me because I know how dangerous SSRI's can be. But luckily I didn't need to take that one for longer than a month or so. After that I switched over to a non-SSRI called welbutrin. I was also taking propranolol for my heart rate spikes that would trigger attacks, depakote, and zyprexa as an antipsychotic at night. Eventually with the help of my psychiatrist dr. bouras, I was able to ween off of everything, and within about 4 months I was back to myself again.


Thinking back on it, my biggest mistake was tripping alone. That's never a smart thing to do with a substance you've never done before, ALWAYS have a babysitter. And (for me) I learned to always have benzo's nearby. In case of another bad trip. Luckily I haven't experienced anything close to that night again, but I haven't touched a tryptamine since either.

[Elision]

oh it was a long time ago haha, i appreciate it though