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Already been to rehab!!!!

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Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Purple23Haze » Mar 8th, '08, 18:05

As I battle this addiction
My conviction simply isn't
What I had envisioned
Krystal's a-l-w-a-y-s insistin'
That I shut my fuckin mouth n listen
Come on this trip n
we can fly like Peter Pan
In never Never land
We aint never ever have ta land
But what happens man
Is a trap in the damned
Where the sand is wet n the water is dry
Whats the fuckin difference when you can fly
You and I may die But eyes keep surprise
On the rise like the tides but I was wise enough to
Brush these drugs to the side and pass by like I flew
No need to ask why it's simply for me oh my not you :smoking: :b: :angry:
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Rap Dogg » Mar 8th, '08, 18:13

Too simple lyrics,nothin special.Stay cool an keep it real.
WHEN I GRAB A PENCIL AND SQUEEZE IT BETWEEN FINGERS,I'M NOT A RAPPER,I'M A DEMON WHO SPEAKS ENGLISH,FREAK GENIUS
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Purple23Haze » Mar 8th, '08, 18:14

Whats simple about it dogg?
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Epidemik » Mar 8th, '08, 18:22

some of the rhymes were a bit simple...
example:
Where the sand is wet n the water is dry
Whats the fuckin difference when you can fly
the only two words that rhymed were dry and fly. (simple)
also it seems like there is never really much of a pause.. like its all one really long sentence lol
not tryin to hate.. just tryin to help.


still liked it though. :y:
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Purple23Haze » Mar 8th, '08, 18:25

I'm not tryin to sound like an ass this is a serious question when should you pause cause I always thought that if it flowed through the whole piece that was ill?

and thank you epidemik for pointing that out I see what you mean
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Epidemik » Mar 8th, '08, 18:28

it can be ill... but sometimes it seems like it was dragged out to long..
i dont know of any spacific time you should pause..maybe if your switchin topics.
just try it and see where it works best.
normally for me i pause on a down note.. or just after
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Purple23Haze » Mar 8th, '08, 18:33

-k- see if this is a better read I wrote this two years ago but changed some shit up

I ust ta wanna be a cowboy
I was a rowdy boy
I played loud wit toys
I wore my shit kickers
but I was raised a city slicker
Forced ta run an itty bit quicker than diarrea
kissed fat girls made em feel pretty like Maria
My teacha, used ta say i was a natural born leader
This chick thought she had ESP while on PMS
So yes she was a know it all bitch and you can't contest
I protest but thats best left ta rest
I don't need that added stress
n I suggest you supress the urge ta slap a hoe
when they act like so
I react like yo u can get tagged like toes
It makes em mad like foes
n I knows girls who will be defendin me
n make the hate form like sworn enemies
You can get bent n torn like Jason Bourne in the bourn supremacy
Oh now you wanna form as a friend ta me
Sendin me friendly messages thats actually offendin me
So I pretend ta be mentally bended like i wasnt sent shit
so you know i was offended
You actin pretentious
assumin that u down in my book as a princess
This is why I leave mooks like you in the distance
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Ka0t1c » Mar 8th, '08, 19:23

the way you wrote the second one is the way u should do it and btw, that one was way better than the first one
oh yeah... and thanks for nothing too
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Purple23Haze » Mar 8th, '08, 19:26

Whats BTW
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Epidemik » Mar 8th, '08, 19:28

by the way
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Re: Already been to rehab!!!!

Postby Purple23Haze » Mar 8th, '08, 19:30

word thanx man
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