The TRshady Forum became read-only in December 2014. The 10 year history will live on, in this archive.
Continue the discussion with the new home for the Eminem and Hip Hop discussion: HipHopShelter.com.

NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Want to share a poem, story or a moving article? Share creative literature text here.

NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Steve Spag » Sep 6th, '08, 19:25

Just wrote this peice today to a beat called "Silent Death" by Rapitfly over on soundclick if anyone wants to check it out. It's got a pretty unique flow for it, which I hope you will get. Some of the rhymes are kind of basic, but I was trying to concentrate more on the flow for this peice. Anyways, let me know what ya' think.

I hate it that you faggots will never treat me right//
Has it been bothering you, can you sleep at night?//
I made a song just for you, on a sheet I write//
What I think at the time, on a beat that's tight//
I must be out of my mind to unleash this type//
An angry man that's inside and he eats what's nice//
It's only fury and rage, there's no peace to find//
But I am turning the page on these freaks who whine//
At a peculiar age, can you lead the blind?//
Can you see what I see, can you free your mind?//
And I ain't worried to say all my equal rights//
There ain't no sequel with me, it's a lethal ride//
And if you read all my rhymes and repeat the lines//
It triggers something inside and it reaps it dry//
It's like a flee to a fly, you can't beat the size//
And all you people in time will just meet demize//

Copywright: Steven Spagnuolo 2008.

Leave Feedback Please :)
Former Rap God
Image
Image
User avatar
Steve Spag
Role Model
Role Model
 
Posts: 3055
Joined: Jul 14th, '06, 21:08
Location: Top Secret.
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Ka0t1c » Sep 6th, '08, 21:15

why do you want feedback, I mean seriously, this song was just a fucking... sick ass rhyme that just kicks ass on and on and on and on and on, you get the point, sorry for misleading everyone who reads this in the beginning but this piece is great, i like the multies at the end, i'd like to see more but it gets the message across right without too many multies... i give this piece a 90/100 since i made myself the new official lyrics critic! 2 thumbs up, way up!!!
oh yeah... and thanks for nothing too
User avatar
Ka0t1c
Role Model
Role Model
 
Posts: 3919
Joined: Nov 16th, '05, 08:28
Location: Hell, Room #5150
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Steve Spag » Sep 6th, '08, 21:18

Kaotic wrote:why do you want feedback, I mean seriously, this song was just a fucking... sick ass rhyme that just kicks ass on and on and on and on and on, you get the point, sorry for misleading everyone who reads this in the beginning but this piece is great, i like the multies at the end, i'd like to see more but it gets the message across right without too many multies... i give this piece a 90/100 since i made myself the new official lyrics critic! 2 thumbs up, way up!!!

Wow man, lol, thanks much. Really appreciated.
Thanks for the positive feedback, haha :y:

Much Respect.
Former Rap God
Image
Image
User avatar
Steve Spag
Role Model
Role Model
 
Posts: 3055
Joined: Jul 14th, '06, 21:08
Location: Top Secret.
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Emadyville » Sep 6th, '08, 22:21

Good to see someone use multies, good shit, keep it up, really liked some of what you were saying in this too.
Menzo wrote:Its cuz you're dope and Daddy Dubs. No one fucks with that


I love you Daren
User avatar
Emadyville
Django
Django
 
Posts: 24833
Joined: Jan 17th, '08, 15:58
Location: Catasauqua PA
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Solace » Sep 7th, '08, 03:59

Man that was just ill. Fucking ill.

I especially loved how each word rhymed. From start to finish (like the last word of the first line rhymes with the last word of the last line), you know what im saying?

Is this just to keep us entertained or is it for Life Overdose?

Anyways, great piece of writing. Loved it. 10/10.
Image
User avatar
Solace
Bad Influence
Bad Influence
 
Posts: 19901
Joined: Apr 25th, '08, 03:12
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Xray » Sep 7th, '08, 04:06

I hate it that you faggots will never treat me right//
Has it been bothering you, can you sleep at night?//
I made a song just for you, on a sheet I write//
What I think at the time, on a beat that's tight//

^^cocky, cause that's simple very simple and yet your acting like its a masterpiece.

other than that the drop is dope.
Image
Over a billion Muslims, you could never stop Islam
Over a billion bullets shooting from the chopper's arm
Carry a motherfucker head that I shred in Nam
I speak literally, figuratively, the prophet gone


New Track: The Nightmare
User avatar
Xray
Pill Popper
Pill Popper
 
Posts: 9920
Joined: Feb 21st, '07, 04:37
Location: Australia
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Steve Spag » Sep 7th, '08, 04:11

shadymademe wrote:Man that was just ill. Fucking ill.

I especially loved how each word rhymed. From start to finish (like the last word of the first line rhymes with the last word of the last line), you know what im saying?

Is this just to keep us entertained or is it for Life Overdose?

Anyways, great piece of writing. Loved it. 10/10.

Thanks a lot man, I appreciate it. This isn't from "Life Overdose" though. I post very very little of that stuff on here. This is just to keep my name out there, lol.

Xray wrote:^^cocky, cause that's simple very simple and yet your acting like its a masterpiece.

other than that the drop is dope.

Thanks, but as I said in the begining "Some of the rhymes are kind of basic, but I was trying to concentrate more on the flow for this peice." I don't try to act cocky, I know where my place is, lol.
Former Rap God
Image
Image
User avatar
Steve Spag
Role Model
Role Model
 
Posts: 3055
Joined: Jul 14th, '06, 21:08
Location: Top Secret.
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Urban Punk » Sep 7th, '08, 14:21

Nice peace bro, even though the vocab lacked a little the flow made up for it :y:
I've mastered numerology and big bang theology, Performed lobotomies with telekinetic psychology http://www.bebo.com/Devilville
User avatar
Urban Punk
Trailer Trash
Trailer Trash
 
Posts: 125
Joined: Sep 2nd, '08, 18:02
Location: The Land Of Nod...
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Arabian Shady » Sep 7th, '08, 16:49

multies and flow were top notch bro,sick stuff :y:
Good stuff :b:
Peace :smoking:
ArAbIaN ShAdY


We're all on the same page, Yet we're standing apart on different lines'
So when we face rage, Ya'll fake it and let THEM commit horrific crimes
50 years & going straight, Yet this performance aint worth your time,OUR
Shit is BACKSTAGE,Cause the front page aint worth Kashmir and Palestine.
"Front Page",Arabian Shady


FiNd mE At dA "CREATIVE SECTION", I AM ULTIMATE INNOVATION!!
User avatar
Arabian Shady
Renegade
Renegade
 
Posts: 2953
Joined: Jul 17th, '06, 13:03
Location: 'DeM SaNd DuNeS... DUBAI!!
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Kez » Sep 7th, '08, 17:24

It's good undeniably

But not nearly as Godly as these people are making out

Nice little verse though :smoking:
User avatar
Kez
Pill Popper
Pill Popper
 
Posts: 8713
Joined: Jun 1st, '06, 20:04
Location: Japan
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby Steve Spag » Sep 7th, '08, 18:48

Thanks for the comments guys, much respect.
:)
Former Rap God
Image
Image
User avatar
Steve Spag
Role Model
Role Model
 
Posts: 3055
Joined: Jul 14th, '06, 21:08
Location: Top Secret.
Gender: Male

Re: NEW STEVE SPAG - Lead The Blind (HOT)

Postby SajN » Sep 8th, '08, 15:11

One of the best peices I've seen from you imo!
Finally u had some multies :p

Flow is, as usual, dope!

Nice rhymes.


:y:


btw.. the "Silent Death" beat is used by me too (and KillahGoat) :p
we have recorded on that beat.. and it's coming out .. soon :wave:
! Is He Nuts? No, He's InSajN !
User avatar
SajN
The Almighty
The Almighty
 
Posts: 14943
Joined: Oct 19th, '06, 18:04
Location: Norway
Gender: Male


Return to Creative Writing



Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users

cron