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Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby Requiem » May 15th, '09, 05:08

i really love the verse, its lyrically impressive. ur delivery needs work. and the screamo effect on some words :o
lol, ur flow was pretty good, a few fall offs. but way better than that old lose yourself track.

overall 6.5/10, improvement. but work on delivery :y:

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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby SajN » May 15th, '09, 09:35

Your delivery needs work.
Lyrics are good, and flow is cool too.

I didn't like the beat, it wasn't enjoyable imo.

I lol'd at the Chris Brown line, pretty cool :y:


Keep improving :y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby Drama Setter » May 15th, '09, 09:41

not bad , bro but why does it stop after a few seconds? you need to work more on it :y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby threeandtwenty » May 15th, '09, 10:22

didnt like your flow at all on this one (i dont mean the doom voice,just how you went on the beat).it was confusing and there was hardly any gap so it sounded too much like talking.but then again,the drum was too fast to flow normally :whistle:

and lyrics were ok....but i think you should maintain a rhyme scheme for at least two lines.

you thought my family was shitty, then let me say hello
I'm high off green hydro, I'm the only damn white guy

^you abandoned rhymes too fast...
hello-hydro-disclose-impose...at least.otherwise it sounds boring. :b:
whose arm is this?..i must've cut it off at the pharmacist
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby MC Anonymous » May 15th, '09, 19:51

Meh...

I didn't hear a flow at all IMO; and it seems like your bored on the mic.
Lyrics was OK... I've seen you do better on your battles though; nothing surprising to me
Delivery was iffy, and beat choice was buttcheeks.

4/10.

ADVICE;
Construct your sentences to your breath; and allow yourself to have pauses in between. This should help your flow immensely. Be more alive on the microphone; and have a better mixer :shifty: (Jk Ice)
:y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby mcZu » May 15th, '09, 20:36

Mr.Starr,

Lyrics were not bad; however, some more multies, switching up your rhyme-scheme, some methaphors and wordplay can't hurt. The flow was strange, at some points it kinda went good, but then all of a sudden it went way off. Delivery needs work, even if you were going for Doom's monotone style, a lil' bit of energy in your voice can do miracles. If your writing to a beat, try to match the rhyme-scheme to teh rythm of the beat. Most people go for the simple ''Snare'' flow, but if you vibe with the beat and put the words on the right spot with the right rythm, than your flow will sound smooth like an instrument.
Just keep working and dropping, the more you record, the better you'll get,

Yours sincerely,

The 26th letter.
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby Solace » May 16th, '09, 14:46

I really couldn't find the rhyme scheme enjoyable nor the flow, sorry dude. I liked the beat though, you just...couldn't flow on it :unsure: Lyrics would have been truly dope with a normal couplet rhyme scheme and multies, but I enjoyed the realness of them when you were talking about your family and stuff. And as Zu said, some metaphors and wordplay wouldn't have hurt. If you re-record this with the feed that's been given I think it'll truly be on some dope shit even if your delivery was bad.
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby Slim Zaddy » May 16th, '09, 18:21

yeah i liked the beat too , i think it cathcy ,, but flow was off and on ,, delivery is not bad ,, just work on it bro ,, lyrics may be the cause for your delievry ,, but i enjoyed it anyway ,, i want to hear from ya again chet ,, keep it up bro :y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby B.A.D. » May 16th, '09, 18:26

Oh, I love that beat!!

the verse is well written and well structured, but you started rapping it on a weird position so all the flow and whyme scheme seems strange, like the flow doesn't fit the beat

you improved a lot in rhyming and writing but you still need to practice how to lay it on a beat,

the mixing is kinda rare, not bad, but diferent

you can do real good, just practice more :y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby Slim Zaddy » May 16th, '09, 18:29

Chet Starr wrote:
Slim Zaddy wrote:yeah i liked the beat too , i think it cathcy ,, but flow was off and on ,, delivery is not bad ,, just work on it bro ,, lyrics may be the cause for your delievry ,, but i enjoyed it anyway ,, i want to hear from ya again chet ,, keep it up bro :y:

thanks alot SZ :y:

I'll go find your latest rhymes in the creative section, I know I haven't feed you in a while.

I bet your hungery :shifty:


yes i'm :happy:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby <Stiiccy> » May 17th, '09, 07:44

this was preety good man..
the way to fix your delivery though is in your case you seem to have a more high pitched voice ...you should take advantage of that and make it higher and dubb the shit out of it...
the flow was actually ok man wasnt anything wrong with it...
i liked the lyrics also...really enjoyable..
let me help you with the delivery though...
:y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby Robbie G » May 17th, '09, 16:11

I like your high pitched voice. :smoking:

The biggest thing imo is the quality. What do you record on? It's not terrible but it could be a lot better.

Keep recording. :y:
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Re: Chet Starr - Starr Gaze

Postby DOPE » May 17th, '09, 16:49

wow what a ridiculously garbage beat that is, sounds like a fucking polyphonic ringtone.

Beats make or break a song basically for the most part.

flow needs to be on point and the lyrics were ok had some good lines in there

pick a different beat redo the same verse.
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