by internet-weed-dude » Sep 24th, '11, 23:22
44 views and not one response? If I didn't have prior obligations earlier consisting of eating hard boiled eggs with Frank's Red Hot Sauce on them to get my daily recommended amount of protein to correspond with the carbohydrates and healthy fat I got from my Peaches & Cream Quaker oatmeal with mayonnaise on it (Yeah, laugh it up. Don't knock it until you try it. Mayo is a great source of the good types of fats your body needs, otherwise you'll have to get it from oils basically.).. Anyways, if I wouldn't have had that prior obligation I would have finished. That's not even close in regards to what I have to say about this man, and at the end of this post, I still won't be ten percent done. I'm working on an online science course and I've been procrastinating and making excuses that are so paper thin, they could blow away with the wind for the past little while, so I have to get at it soon. I'll just add a little more for now.
Remember when I was talking about how Eminem meant it when he said he "Just doesn't give a fuck" on the SSLP? It applies in more areas than the ones I specified on in the OP. You know how Dre discovered him when he saw him rapping at the rap olympics in 97'? Eminem is considered one of the best freestylers ever, and it's all because he's developed his own completely unique method of executing them. Most people believe that freestyling is thinking of rhymes on the spot, and it's quite hard to do. It's a skill that can be learned, as I've been practicing since age 15, and 9 years later, I can go on and on without having to stop, whereas when I saw 8 mile at age 15, I HAD to become a good freestyler cause it was the coolest shit ever. Expressing your opinions all while messing with the English language and applying it to melodies that speak in voices uncomprehendable to our naked ear, but that tell us something different subliminally with each combination of notes. This is a topic on it's own and very hard for me to explain, but I believe each combination of notes in a melody, or even a rap beat creates whichever mood it tends to with most people because changes in frequencies deliver messages that our minds can't comprehend in a manner in which we can't verbalize what we're taking in and express it to others directly, instead vaguely by using adjectives like "Fucking deep man, hey pass that shit!".. but we definitely feel it.. but yeah.. we can not describe them with any words in our language. You know when you just can't explain what you feel when you hear something that gives you goosebumps? The only thing I've come to conclude is that raising from a solid well placed high note represents ascendancy that is a constant. The rest I'm sure is much more complicating.. especially when you factor in how many possibly note combinations there are. There's literally infinity, since there's no largest number that could represent amounts of notes, and there's no smallest number that could represent the shortest note possible. We theoretically should never arrive at a note after the preceding one if our math system is correct. We'd just keep getting one decimal point further away from a millasecond until there's infinity decimal places but never get there.. ugh.. fucked up world.. anyways, Yeah.. freestyling is awesome, and rap is awesome. I may be getting side-tracked, but nothing annoys me more than when someone says "It better not be rap, rap is crap." All I hear is "I'm a close minded fuck that has his mind made up and nothing is going to change it because I've already decided I don't like it." You know what I say? You can't explain things to stupid people. Assume you were placed in a hypothetical scenario in which you were walking to arby's to get a beef and cheddar sandwich with no cheddar because you're allergic to most dairy products, and you get abducted by a bunch of talking portable DVD players driving a pedophile van. Their van has out of this world power and somehow transports you to a planet where you can sustain life, yet you are the only human. The rest of the people there are baseball cards with the minds of chimpanzees for some reason. Someone had some weird sex. Anyways, try explaining something to these cards.. are they going to understand you? No, they will think you are stupid, because you make absolutely no sense, and it's all because THEY ARE THE ONES WHO ARE TOO STUPID TO COMPREHEND IT. That's life as an intelligent person here on Earth.
ANYWAYS.
Eminem thought of a way to freestyle that puts his on the spot verses on a different level than most of the other rappers out. The secret? Get this, he secretly memorizes some lines that he can use in case he ends up in a jam, and he uses them if he gets stuck! It's fucking genius! and he doesn't tell anyone! Why don't other rappers do this and just claim that it was all off of the top of their head? Eminem is so badass and not giving of a fuck that he doesn't even care if he gets exposed as a phony. (Which I can't believe no one has done yet.) Get the hell off of motherless.com and get both of your hands on the keyboard. I want you to open a new browser window and go to youtube, and check out the old rap olympic battles from 97 that Em was in. Pay close attention to the rap he spits after proclaiming "Wow.. I've never battled no female before." In case you're a complete fucking moron, it ends when he says "You wanna be a dope MC? Don't be going and taking your PERIOD out on me."
He gets applause.
Now, fast forward half a decade to late 2002. Anyone ever hear of a movie called 8 mile? Of course you have, and you dream about doing something like Eminem did when he won the battles at the end in front of all of those people, but it will never happen because even if you get really good at rhyming, even on Eminem's level, you're not going to be able to have the "White boy growing up in Detroit" card to play, and that's one less disadvantage to overcome and have people respect you for overcoming. Anyways, you know those people at the shelter saying "Fuck the free world! 313!".. Anyone who saw the extra's on the 8 mile DVD knows that they all got bored being there for days and they set up a rap battling competition to pass time for those actors, and the top 4 got to battle Eminem. Eminem, being an exemplary entertainer was so concerned about giving us the most perfect performance in the movie possible, that he decided not to actually battle the people that won the competition.. instead, he decided to lip synch and pretend to say stuff back to the people. He didn't want to lose his voice spending a total of 4 minutes or so battling some randoms, meanwhile in the movie he's constantly shouting "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?! LILLY IS IN THE OTHER ROOM BY HER SELF RIGHT NOW!" so I guess it was only fair to give him a break. Not liking being taunted when he said nothing back to the battler against him, he decided to actually battle, and the crowd loved it. If it were me, considering the only things I'd have to use against the people I'm battling would be their physical appearance, including clothing, OR , what they said about me if they went first. If you went first, you'd only have their appearance to go by.. so what I'd do (and I'm sure Eminem has done) is take every body type, every type of fashion you commonly see, every shirt colour, or colour of pants, and memorized a punchline so he can instantly rhyme something relevant about the contender and create the illusion that he only had the time in which he stood in front of the contender to think about it. Any moron could figure the loopholes in rap battles.. anyways, when the fourth, final, and female contender is up, Eminem gets great applause when he says "You wanna be a dope MC? Don't be going and taking your PERIOD out on me!"
Now, I could see accidentally using the line because you don't have much time to think, but since while at the rap olympics, he attacks other people for saying "99% of THAT shit, was written." "You gon' swear this shit was written, but it wasn't! kill a dozen rappers while I'm buzzin!", and in 8 mile, "Go home, write some shit, make it suspenseful (crowd guys "OOOO!!!! NO HE DIDN'T ACCUSE HIM OF WRITING THAT") The guy puts so much fucking emphasis on the single point that writing the odd line, or memorizing something that will fit for a particular personality you might be up against is wrong, yet does it himself, on two things that any fan will definitely hear.. the thing is, most fans aren't like me, and they want to keep Eminem from looking bad at all costs. Just thought I'd point that out. NO ONE in their right mind would go to a serious freestyle battling competition with stakes involved and not do what I described up above, and anyone who believes that they're all honest and they have the integrity to not memorize any shit before hand while KNOWING that most if not ALL of their contenders are doing the same thing is a fucking Windows 3.1 desktop PC from 1992 freezing while opening comptons interactive encyclopedia (which only shows a couple of microscopic pics of vaginal disease when you type in vagina, fucking wannabe pre-emptive internet rip-off). INCOMPETENT. INCOMPETENT TO USE LOGIC IN A WORLD AS COMPLICATING AS OURS.
More later.